Other Side of the Door
by teacupsNmints
Summary: This story parallels Open Door Policy in Edward's POV. Open Door Policy won 2nd place in the Forbidden Affairs contest. And it's always fun to know what Edward is thinking! I will alternate updates between the 2 fics. AH AU ExB
1. Chapter 1

**A/N Thank you so much for all your encouragement and support during the Forbidden Affairs contest. This very very newbie is in AWE after placing 2nd! WOW!!! **

**Many of you mentioned in your reviews that you wanted to know what Edward was thinking. Well---here you go! I will be alternating updates between Other Side of the Door and Open Door Policy---keeping them in the same time-frame. I will have one more update for this fic before turning back to Open Door Policy and Bella's POV. Thanks again to everyone for being so lovely!!**

**And please---please---please---If you like it---leave me some love!**

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer---I just like to bring her characters out to play!**

Ch. 1

I adjusted my ear buds and tried to get comfortable in my seat as my mind went to a place it hadn't been in a very long time. Forks, Washington had been my home although I never felt at home there. I'd never really felt at home anywhere---except in her eyes. If only she'd known I was there.

London had been home for the past 4 years. It's the place of my education---both academic and social----_ummm and sexual_. It's where I grew up. And I did some considerable growing up during my time there.

I thought back to my first day on campus. The buildings were huge. The faces unfamiliar. I had no fear. Strangers had never been much of a threat to me---you have to care about someone before their actions can hurt you. And my family took care of that---which is pretty much why I chose the school furthest from my home that had granted me acceptance. And that is exactly what The University of East London provided me-----acceptance. I longed to be anyone but Emmett's weird little brother. And that is where I found myself ---my identity.

Perhaps I should clarify. My parents were attentive and strived to provide a safe and nurturing environment. They met my needs as best they could---but they never really understood me. I remember pizza on Friday nights as everyone gathered up their foam fingers and air horns for the weekly big game. Every game was big in our house. And every game belonged to Emmett.

I wasn't like my brother.  
It wasn't that I didn't like sports---it was more that they didn't like me. As big and strong as my brother was---I was equally thin, uncoordinated and awkward. As focused as Emmett was on whatever his endeavor---my head was consistently in the clouds---thinking about how things could be.  
I was definitely the artist---the dreamer to Emmett's athletic God.

Many evenings in London, I found myself unable to sleep, spending entire nights awake---totally consumed in thoughts of why my brother would pursue the only girl I could even see. I'd confided in him---against my better judgment---and he proved himself unworthy of my confidence. It had made no sense. Emmett was involved with Rosalie Hale---I had caught them stealing moments under stairwells and in the woods behind our family home. She was the prettiest and most popular girl in town. He was the quarterback to her head cheerleader. They were made for one another. Bella Swan---was the treasurer of the drama club. Not at all Emmett's typical conquest. I never got over the sudden vigor with which he pursued my Bella. She had been mine---in my mind and my dreams for as long as I could remember dreaming of girls at all. We'd never spoken. But our eyes had met on many occasions. I relished in the memories of our holding glances before her cheeks would blush and she'd eventually tear away. It took an entire year of sorrow filled beers in random London pubs to finally erase Bella's eyes from where they been etched in my mind for what I thought would be forever. Then, like bandages had been removed---I could finally see again.

That is when I met Margie--a cute little French girl who I shared a humanities class with. We shared many things during my next 4 years. All the things American boys assume about French girls---I found to be true in Margie. She was open and honest, loving and uninhibited, sensual and erotic. She was quite a free spirit---- experienced with men and found no shame in that fact. We spent many nights wrapped in each others arms, nothing between our bodies but beads of sweat. She spent endless hours teaching me the art of sensual touch, falatio and lovemaking, as well as how to allow myself to be pleased. Margie will always hold a special place in my soul---but for me, she was still no Bella Swan---though she did teach me every bit of knowledge I had been lacking about women and made my 4 years in London the best of my life so far.

Margie and I had never made a commitment, though I was faithful to her and I'm pretty sure she was exclusive to me as well. At graduation, she headed back to Paris and I found myself boarding this plane, heading to the one place on earth I thought I'd never find myself staying---Forks Washington---at my brother Emmett's house that he shares with his wife----- Bella.

It has been so long since my mind had drifted to Bella, that I didn't hesitate when Emmett suggested I stay with him. I can't say I'd forgotten, because some things are never deemed forgettable. I admit I avoided their wedding---claiming final exams although the semester had actually already ended. I just hadn't pictured her face---or her eyes---or said her name in such a very long time.

Now, sitting here on this plane---it is all I can think about. I wonder if she is happy. I wonder what it is about my brother that appealed to her. I wonder if she even remembers me. I had to swallow hard just to get past the lump in my throat.  
I chose to close my eyes and just try to rest a little---to pass some time during my long journey. As I drifted off, my mind took me back.

_I was standing under the stairwell right outside the cafeteria at Forks High. My cool trench pulled up high---ear buds in but not on. I heard her before I saw her. Bella's deep laugh followed by her cousins high pitched giggle edged closer. Eyes cast down, I turned in the direction of the sounds. I'd decided I would finally speak to her---even though Emmett told me to wait---to make her come to me. I could not wait another moment. I was going to say hello and ask her how she was doing. And if the conversation managed to carry itself--- I was going to show Bella the picture I'd sketched of her---and hope she liked it. My heart bounced around inside my chest until it was the only sound I could hear. My palms were sweating and my mouth was dry. I watched as Bella came around the corner, her mahogany hair tumbling about shoulders. She was wearing the white blouse with the colorful stitching that always made her brown eyes seem to sparkle. I took two steps toward her. That was all I had time for before it happened. Bounding up behind her ---he grabbed her around the middle until her feet tossed up into the air. She giggled sweetly before reaching around and kissing him on the lips. I shook my head and blinked my eyes---hoping I was mistaken. My eyes traveled up to the face of this intruder----only to find the eyes of my brother Emmett looking directly through me---like I wasn't even there. I crumbled the drawing in my palm and tucked it back into the pocket of my trench. _

I woke as the plane was landing in Seattle. Once I'd made it inside and found my luggage I headed toward the passenger pick-up area. I gripped the handles of my bags tightly as I searched the faces for one I recognized. Standing a few yards away, holding a large piece of poster board with big red block letters that read "Welcome home Edward!" was Emmett. He wore the goofiest grin I think I'd ever seen and he ran in my direction once he spotted me.

"Little Bro!" he said as he threw his arms around me , squeezing tightly, and lifted my completely off the ground. "Damn it's so good to see you! How was your flight? Do you need anything? Tell me all about London on the way home. I can't wait to hear everything."

I think Emmett said more words to me at that moment than he had said our entire 3 years together in high school.

I smiled and patted him on the shoulder. "I'm a little jet lagged. Is it okay if I take a few minutes to adjust?"

"Holy shit! Your voice! Oh that is so cool. Wait til Bella hears you!"  
My stomach lurched, but I managed to fake a smile.

"Say something else Edward." he urged with enthusiasm.

"I'm really tired." I offered---hoping that would do.

"Aww--c'mon---just once more---please." Emmett begged.

"I have to pee." I shrugged.

"That is so cool—the ladies of Forks are going to frigging …" he smiled at me with a look of awe---which was something I'd never seen him direct at me before.

"No, Emmett---I really need to take a leak." I said with a laugh.

"Oh---sorry. Go ahead. I'll load your bags and wait here."

Emmett talked nonstop the entire way to Forks. It was like he'd been saving up conversation the entire 4 years I'd been gone. It was as if nobody ever talked to him. I kept my eyes closed and listened. Each time I'd start to doze---I'd hear him mention her name ---and a sick feeling would overtake me.

I opened my eyes when I felt the jeep jerk to a stop. We were parked in front of a large two story house I did not recognize. It was either new or newly redone. Either way, Emmett had done well for his family.

Before I could even make my way out of the passenger seat, my brother already had my bags in his arms, heading toward the front door. Not wishing to be rude, I hurried to catch up.

He called for Bella to come and hear me talk. _Great---a freak show---just like old times. _I caught myself nervously running my hands through my hair---before securing them in my pockets.

And then there she was. I swallowed hard as my heart leapt for a second. Then I gained control. I watched as she entered the room. Her hair still tumbled onto her shoulders. Her body was as exquisite as I remembered. Her complexion still milky and smooth. She looked exactly the same---yet strangely different. Something about her was definitely different. Her chocolate brown eyes---something was different in her eyes.

"Hello Edward…it's so nice to …"  
I was startled by the sound of a voice I had yearned to hear for so long.

I leaned forward and I hugged her, cordially of course. Her body felt soft beneath my fingers---just as I'd imagined it would so long ago. As soon as I withdrew and saw her pull her extended arm away, I realized that she'd been expecting a handshake. I forgot that what had become commonplace for me in Europe, was not necessarily so here in the states. I would have to make an effort to keep things more formal with Bella---which would probably be best anyway.

"Thank you, Bella. I appreciate your hospitality and that you are willing to share your home for a bit."

Bella's face became the sweetest shade of pink before she suddenly cast her eyes down. I wondered if I'd said something wrong. As I replayed my words in my mind, she looked back up at me and smiled. That is when I recognized it. I knew that look from Margie and it puzzled me. The look was desire. _Bella Swan looked at me with desire._ The 16 year old inside of me jumped for joy. Except, she was no longer Bella Swan. She was Bella Cullen. And she was not mine.

"You can put your bags up in the guest room---third door on the left. Then please join us in the dining room for dinner. I hope you're hungry." She offered with sincere warmth in her tone.

Before I could even grab my bags, Emmett was bounding up the stairs with them calling to me as he took the steps two at a time. I followed along---unsure what else to do.

It was a beautiful home. On the wall at the top of the stairs hung a large wedding photo. I stopped a moment to look at it. My brother and his wife looked very happy on their wedding day. I could see our parents in the background beaming. Nobody would even have guessed that an immediate family member was missing.

I passed the bathroom---first door on the left. I made a mental note---I'd want to remember that one. Next was a closed door---I assumed an office or guest room. Across from it, I could tell through the open door that it was the master bedroom---complete with a King size bed. Mine was the last door on the left. It had a full size bed, a bureau and a television. It was decorated in shades of blue and green. It was very welcoming and quite hospitable.

"Let's go Bro----Bella doesn't like it when dinner gets cold." Emmett said.  
The first thing I noticed as I walked into the dining room was the delicious aroma. It was a favorite I recognized from my past---my mother's beef and noodle casserole. She must have shared the recipe with Bella. I couldn't believe Bella went to the trouble---for me.

"You made my favorite, Bella. That was very kind of you." I said to her.

She looked into her plate. "Your Mom emailed me the recipe. It was just something I could do to welcome my brother-in-law home."

Her eyes darted up to mine for just a moment accompanied by a slight smile, before they dropped back to her plate where they remained for the rest of our meal. She was so beautiful. The simple sound of her voice made me once again feel like a nervous 16 year old. .

The entirety of dinner and dessert was completely overpowered by Emmett. He told off-color jokes, brought up stories from our childhood that I had long struggled to forget and made sexual innuendos toward Bella. She ate her meal in silence---periodically glancing up at Emmett. If she looked at me at all, she kept it hidden. I didn't remember her being so quiet and withdrawn. It was as if my brother, and his overzealous need to be the main attraction of every event, had sucked the very life right out of her

The moment Bella completed cleaning up after dinner and excused herself to her room, Emmett grabbed two beers from the fridge and slid one over to me.

"So, Eddie, tell me all about the women in London."

"There's not much to tell---they are much the same as the women here."

"Oh---I've heard stories of European women---c'mon---I want to hear what they're like in bed."

"I'm afraid I haven't much to share."

"You do like women right?" My brother asked me---not in a mean way----just honestly.. But this was the second time he'd asked me that same question.

"Yes, Emmett. I like women very much. I have been with women. I know a great deal more now that I lived in London than I ever could have learned here."

"Well, bro----spill. I want to hear the good stuff."

I raised my brows and shrugged. "I'm sorry."

He looked at me like I was had a third eye.  
"C'mon---let me live vicariously---I'm an ol' married guy. My days of hot sex are over."

I felt like someone punched me in the stomach, although I wasn't sure why.  
I shook my head "No."

He snickered.. "I get it. You learned some fancy pants manners over in London---so you're not gonna kiss and tell."

I smiled---because I suddenly realized I had the upper hand. For the first time in my entire life, I had control when it came to my brother.

"Damn Edward---that's just selfish. But hey---to each his own. I can respect that."

Margie would have wanted me to show Emmett up---to silence him with shocking details of the times we spent together. But I couldn't. I knew if I shared details of my sex life, Emmett would have to top me with details of his. I had no desire to go there.

Emmett continued to hand me beers each time he got one for himself. The more he drank the louder he got. The louder he got, the more he laughed at his own jokes. I laughed to---to be polite---and because I had a buzz.  
Finally, I used jetlag as an excuse and headed up the stairs to my room. As I reached the top, my eyes immediately went to the door of Bella's room. She was probably sleeping. I could picture her brown hair astray on the pillow. Her chest rising and falling in a silent pattern. The sounds of her delicate breaths.

Ohhhh. I felt myself begin to stiffen and figured my brother might not like it if he caught his brother gazing at his bedroom door with a hard-on---so moved on to my room.

Once I was unpacked and wearing only my boxer briefs, I dropped onto the bed, turned on the TV and tried to find something to take my mind off the absurdity of what was now my existence.  
I could hear Emmett coming up the stairs. The guy did nothing quietly.  
I must have dozed off for a few minutes, because when I came to---my stiffy was back and I really had to pee. Too much beer.

The house was quiet, so I slipped on a pair of sweats, just in case, and headed down the hall.  
Once I'd moved several steps away from my door, I could hear my brother's voice. I guess everyone was not asleep.  
As I passed their room, the door was wide open. Just as I passed, my brother again spoke and as a reflex I looked in. I shouldn't have but I did.

And there they were----in the middle of intercourse. I couldn't call it making love---because only one participant appeared to be enjoying themselves---and even that seemed minimal. My eyes instinctively went to her. Bella's face was distant and unemotional---like she was just waiting until it was over---like someone sitting in a Dr's office.  
My heart broke for her. I was glued to the indifference in her eyes. How could someone so beautiful, be so poorly loved?

And my brother---mauling her like a bear. What the hell was wrong with him? He wasn't even considering her needs. I bet he just stomped in here and woke her up!

__

Wait---what the hell am I doing? Edward---go! Move! Now!

And then it was too late. Her eyes caught me. I held my breath and stood frozen. I expected her to scream. I thought my life would be passing before my eyes any moment when my Neanderthal brother would hurl me down the stairs---and the saddest part was that there wasn't anything that could pass before my eyes that was I even interested in seeing. I only wanted to see the breathtaking creature before me.

Bella looked at me---scared and embarrassed--- and I knew I needed to tear myself away---for her. But then I realized---she was still looking at me---eyes locked with mine---and the longer I remained---she more she appeared to be relaxing. The line between her brows smoothed and she suddenly looked like she was enjoying herself.

Emotion shot through me so strongly, combined with the level to which I was now aroused mixed with the alcohol, I thought it wise to brace myself in the door frame.

As I rested my head on my shoulder, Bella gasped!

__

So fucking hot! I'd never wanted someone so badly in my life.

This, however, only led the idiot mauling her to believe that he was actually doing something right.

"Bella, I've never heard you so excited!" he groaned.

As if it had anything to do with him. No wonder he wanted to hear my stories----his sex life was a joke.

At that thought I realized---he said she had never been this excited before. I did this for her. I felt pure joy. This girl I'd loved for so long---now a woman---I could do something for her that my perfect brother couldn't. I couldn't help but smile---and as soon as I did--- a new look of desire filled her eyes---wild---erotic---uncontrollable. Bella's body began to writhe and then suddenly tightened. Her eyes glazed over---still locked with mine. Then it happened. The feral fire I always imagined to burn inside her was released. And then, within my gaze, Bella rode out the most exquisite orgasm I'd ever witnessed---all the time her eyes on me. She had a look of frightened pleasure---but why would she be afraid---mid orgasm? Certainly this couldn't be her first.

I wanted so much to curl her into my arms and hold her until she fell asleep. I wanted to sprinkle her shoulders with tender kisses and gently remove the strands of hair now sticking to her fore head. But I couldn't---I didn't dare. I had to leave---quickly. The last sound I heard as I hurried to my room was my brother's voice.

"Damn Bella---that was really good. I hope I can remember what I did."

Jackass.

Once in my room, it suddenly hit me what I had actually done.

__

Shit----how do I even face her in the morning? What could she possibly be thinking? I am such a dumb fuck!

And Dammit---I never did take that leak.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Wow---Edward's POV became quite lengthy! THanks to everyone sticking with my story---and I love the feedback and encouragement!! A shout out to miztrezboo, dazzled eyes 22, meadowgirl552, Gasaway Alley, lobsters1128 and cravingtwilight for their seriously inspiring words. Thanks to Helese for the very detailed reviews she left for both stories---that is incredibly helpful!**

**And lots of Edward junk---buttonflies----and jawporn to lovingit for her help getting this out. I was super nervous about this one----and she made it all better!!**

**As always----I am only borrowing SM's characters----I only wish they were mine!**

Ch.2

_Geezuz---my head. _

I opened my eyes and took in my surroundings. The first morning in a new place is always disorienting. Then I remember.

_Last night!_

_Shit._

I sat up on the edge of the bed and my head beat out a tune that rivaled the drum solo in Wipe Out.

_Fuck! I watched my brother screw his wife. _

Then I remember her face when I found her there. The look of total tedium staring up at that ceiling. I wondered how many times she'd had to do that---pretend. I wondered if she'd memorized every crevice and dimple in the plaster up there. I wondered if Emmett had any idea---or even cared.

Then I recalled how embarrassed she looked when our eyes met. Poor sweet Bella. She didn't want anyone to know.

I turned my thoughts to the comfort I saw grow in her eyes---the excitement---the passion---the want---and I laid back onto the bed, smiling. I had completely ignored Mon Tresor last night---_that's what Margie had named him---my--um--anyway_---and he'd been pretty patient---as he was reminding me. So, I allowed my hand to reach down and ease the pain of my wanton erection as my mind wandered to Bella's molten chocolate eyes looking to me for guidance---assurance---fulfillment. I wrapped my mind around the moment Bella's magnificent orgasm washed over her like a thirst-quenching rain on the waterless desert. Every worry---every embarrassment---every care---every frustration cleansed away . With her in my thoughts only---I rode out my own wave of pleasure. Yet, it left me still longing---longing for her ---her touch---for her body.

I cleaned up and took a long cool shower. I certainly didn't want to show up at breakfast sporting any left over morning wood. I pulled on my sweats and a flannel shirt before venturing toward the door.

I nervously tangled my fingers in my hair, as I headed down the stairs. I didn't know what to expect.

How in the hell would I even approach her? Would she acknowledge it? Should I act like it didn't happen? I probably should---just a unfortunate event---taboo---that should never have happened. But I knew I couldn't do that---I'd just be enabling her to live her life of charade.

_Holy Hell! _

Would she have told Emmett?

_If she did---I'm a dead man. _

There was no point in dwelling on that possibility, as I'd have to find out eventually.

I decided my best option was to just let it play out and do what comes naturally.

_Oh yeah Edward---that really worked for ya last night!_

I had only one choice---get it over with.

Emmett was already in the kitchen dancing around like he had just won the lottery. Actually he had---my lottery.

"Mornin' Bro---sleep okay?" he asked.

"Perfectly, thanks." I replied.

"Me, too---best night's sleep I've had in awhile." He was gloating.

Nothing---no response from me.

"Yep---nothing like going to sleep totally exhausted." he continued.

I was not joining his game. I picked up a section of the paper from the table and busied myself. _Like getting laid by your wife was some grand occasion. Oh--yeah---for him it was._

I looked at my brother. Big stupid smile on his face. Dancing around like he was The Love God himself. And all of it a hoax. I actually felt sorry for him at that moment.

Then, Bella entered the kitchen and Emmett greeted his precious wife ----with a slap to the bum.

"Morning Bella." I said----anxious to break the ice.

She looked like hell, wearing a parka---or a robe that might as well have been a parka. It was wrapped around her entire body---covered from the top of her neck to the tips of her slippers. It even had long sleeves.

Her body language told me she was ashamed, so I kept my eyes hidden behind the newspaper. Anything to make her more comfortable.

I had to talk to her. I had to let her know what intimacy could be like for her----even if never with me. Maybe I could still help her--tell her---teach her to be happy with what she has. I'd do that for her.

Bella's warmth extended across the table as she sat across from me. I could smell her skin---the lust left over from last night. She'd not showered.

All at once, electricity shot through me as I reached for another section of the paper and, by chance, for seconds---our hands met. Her simple touch was an intense rush of smoldering desire.

She pulled her hand away abruptly---angrily. _She was angry---with me._

I could feel my heart a lump in my throat.

"Oh---I'm sorry." I hoped my tone comforted her. I certainly wasn't trying to antagonize her in any way.

We each sat in silence, eyes in our newspapers---as Emmett bustled around talking a mile a minute. I couldn't even tell what he said---but I could tell you how many times Bella swallowed hard, adjusted in her seat and cleared her throat during that same period of time.

Once Emmett left for work the air in that kitchen really thickened. It was stifling. I couldn't stand it.

Coffee---I needed coffee. I took a sip from the cup Emmett must have placed in front of me before he left.

Blech! It was black---needed sugar.

I stood without looking---to find Bella already standing at the counter. I approached her awkwardly and spotted the sugar packets directly in front of her. I stood hesitantly behind her for a moment before choosing to just go for it.

"Excuse me Bella---I need some sugar."

She smelled so sweet. I breathed deeply to thoroughly appreciate her scent. I'd been standing there too long---too close---and then she turned---meeting my eyes.

Heat---fire---lust--all surged through me at the same time. I needed to say something.

_Say something!_

"So, Bella, how long have you been faking orgasms with my brother?"

_Fuck---not that!_

My heart was beating so damn hard---may face was numb. Then she looked at me---and she was pissed off!

I suddenly knew how it might feel to be injured on the battle field as you watch the enemy approach. Except that this enemy was someone with whom I wanted to introduce sweet sexual ecstasy.

Her tone was sharp and her words clipped.

"That's none of your business--- and I'm doing no such thing!"

She looked at me with fury---her normally warm eyes now a shade of deep charcoal. And seeing this Bella---this new Bella---just made me want to throw her down on the table and love the hate right out of her. And the degree to which I was totally screwed for my brother's wife suddenly seemed ---funny.

And that's when I made a dire mistake. I tried to stifle it, but I couldn't. I laughed---not loudly---not happily---a little nervously---but mostly gutturally.

She responded--in a way I was not expecting---she was …direct.

"Exactly how long were you standing in your brother's doorway before you started ----eye fucking his wife?"

_Oh sweet Jeezuz!_

Just hearing Bella Swan--- Cullen---whatever--- say "eye-fucking" made my dick twitch. I was so turned on---and so impressed by her just saying what she was thinking and for acknowledging what had happened. Finally ---we were communicating--with words.

I gave her my cocky little smile that Margie had always loved and said,

"About as long as it took her to enjoy _being_ eye fucked."

That. Made. Her. Really. Fucking. Mad.

"I'm not discussing this with you any further." And she looked more distant than ever as those words left her lips.

I didn't want her to shut down. She needed to understand that it was okay to just-- feel. Whether or not it was acceptable, it--- "was" ---and there was no denying that.

"Admit it. You liked it." I urged softly.

_Oh no---she was leaving._

"I noticed you haven't said that you didn't like it." I begged.

She cast her eyes at mine---and for a moment I saw last night's fire smoldering behind them. And then, she cast her gaze to the floor---ashamed. And she ran up the stairs.

"I'm sorry---I only wanted to make you happy---that's all I've ever wanted."

I said it under my breath. She didn't need to hear it.

I finished my coffee and cleaned up after breakfast---it was the least I could do since I'd managed to totally perturb and chase the woman of the house out of her own kitchen. By the time I was done, Bella had already left the house.

I had been in Forks almost 24 hours. There was something I had to do----or I would live to regret it.

I walked the six blocks it took to get to my childhood home. Mom must have noticed me coming up the walk. She almost tackled me as she came barreling toward. I couldn't help but smile. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she held tightly around my neck and mumbled incoherent words about her baby boy.

She took a step back and said "Let me look at you!"

I held my hands out to the side and she motioned for me to turn around.

"You aren't my boy anymore, Edward. You are my very handsome man." She had tears in her eyes and her face was filled with pride.

My throat tightened and I couldn't fight the smile that settled on my lips---even though it made me more than a bit uneasy.

"Come in! We can catch up."

She took my hand to squeeze, holding it as we walked up the sidewalk to the house.

"Your father is working---but he'll be home later. Or you can stop by his office. He is very anxious to see you!"

"I planned to go by his office later. I wanted to stop by to see my favorite lady first." I said as I squeezed her hand back.

"Oh---my---my boy has grown up. They taught you well in London."

I'm sure she had been expecting the lost soul in a trench coat when I got home. Mom was genuinely pleased with my transformation.

"So---what have you been keeping busy with lately?" I asked.

"Oh---the usual. I attend the Women's Club meetings in town, lead several charitable organizations and continue to lead the football mom's group at the high school."

My mother always worked hard in order to be the perfect image of the doctor's wife for all the townsfolk. It was a responsibility she put on herself. My mother took her title very seriously.

"Edward, I don't want tot talk about me----I want to hear about you. I see the man before me---but I want to know how he got here."

Mom was relentless---but it was glorious. She was so incredibly proud as I told her about all the classes I took and the places I visited. I could tell in her eyes that she was living vicariously through my stories---so I was sure to embellish them just a bit. Because the majority of my time was spent with a certain little French girl getting the education of a lifetime. Oh---I did visit the places I spoke of---but I censored the stories for my mother---because she really did not need to know the details of what actually went on while I was there.

Our conversation soon turned to Emmett---and Bella. Mom showed me the wedding album. And I forced myself to look at every picture, all the while trying hard to fight the bile working it's way into my throat. My mother was also proud of Emmett---and she loved Bella with all her heart.

"You know Edward----I've never told anyone this---but I am partially responsible for uniting Emmett and Bella."

_What???_

Despite my inner torment, my mother smiled on.

"Come---I'll show you what started it all."

My mother took my hand and led me out the back door.

Wow our yard seemed smaller than I remembered. As a child, it seemed we had an entire ocean ---battlefield---distant planet---whatever the imagination called for---right outside our backdoor. And now---it appeared---it was just an ordinary sized yard.

We walked amongst the trees I'd climbed and played in as a youngster---until mom led me over to one I remembered. It was an enormous cherry tree.

It was the spring of my sophomore year. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom and their intoxicatingly sweet aroma filled our back yard. My head was filled with Bella Swan.

Mom led me to the far side of the tree and pointed up. There hidden in the curve of a high branch I spied my workmanship for years passed.

EC + BS

I couldn't believe it was still there after all these years.

Mom spoke with enthusiasm. "I found that one day in the fall while I was raking out here. I wasn't sure at the time who BS was---so I became a sort of detective."

She again took my hand and led me ---this time to the basement.

I remembered the summer Emmett and I were told we had to paint the basement. I had actually welcomed the opportunity to contribute to our home. Emmett---not so much. And spending half the day convincing me that it was my responsibility as the younger brother to have my big bros back----he left---I assumed to see Rosalie. And I was left in peace to paint the basement myself. I remember painting Bella's name all over the room before finally filling in with the remaining color.

Mom led me behind the stairs and pointed. There was the old mint green paint that I had replaced and painted on the back of the third step in beige paint was Bella's name.

"That's how I found out that the B stood for Bella. Emmett was never one to pursue girls---they always did that! So when I discovered that there was one who caught his eye---I had to do something. So I went to Carol Hale---her daughter Rosalie was head cheerleader---do you remember her?"

I stared at my mother in a numb daze and only listened as the words left my lips.

"Vaguely."

"Well, I figured her mother might be familiar with many of the girls in town ---seeing as she had a daughter. She was more than happy to help me discover that this Bella S was actually our Bella."

_Our Bella._

"She went to Bella's mother---and the rest is history. Emmett has no idea I meddled---please don't tell him."

I was already shaking my head---not intentionally---but by reflex---but at least it was an appropriate response.

_She never even considered that it could've been me._

When I left my mom, I was heading to see my dad at the hospital. But somehow I found myself standing outside the door of my brother's office building.

I didn't go in. I just stood there. What could I possibly say to him?

"_Hey Emmett ---mom made a mistake---it was supposed to be me---so please hand over your wife."_

A while later---not sure how long I stood there outside Emmett's building---I noticed a pub across the street and headed over.

It was dark inside---lit solely by colorful lamps advertising a variety of alcoholic inebriants. I walked up to the dark wooden bar and pulled out a tall stool.

"Can I----hey---no way---Edwierd?"

Looking at me from behind the bar----with an enormous maniacal grin and hair pointing every which way---was a very strangely dressed fellow. He wore a porkpie hat and had on a thin tie reminiscent of the 80's. On his feet were large yellow cowboy boots.

"Dude---it's me---Jasper---you know Whitlock."

Holy shit. Jasper Whitlock was the only guy even more recluse than me in high school.

"Whitlost! How the hell have you been?"

"Pretty good---can't complain. The gods have provided and I have claimed. I am now the sole proprietor of this fine establishment---livin the dream. And you---my brother from another ---sound as if you have just returned to us in this fine town of the lost and forgotten."

"Yes---I was studying abroad---in London---just got back yesterday."

"Well that, my friend, is cause for jubilation. Can I get you a drink---on the house of course?"

"Please---house draft is fine."

"I must say---my brother---I never thought I'd see the day that you'd return to Forks---especially when I heard you chose to opt out of the grand nuptials."

"What?"

"No judgement here---can't blame ya. I'd be pissed, too if my flesh n blood moved in on my heart's desire."

_This guy was starting to sound like my own personal Yoda._

"Whitlock----look----since I don't recall bearing my soul to you in high school---what the hell are you talking about?"

"Did you or did you not spend 4 or more years of your young life makin eyes at Miss Bella Swan?"

I furrowed my brow---trying to figure out how he could have known that.

He was smirking at me now. "Deny me if you can that you did not long for the feel of her pale skin and memorize the every sparkle of her brown eyes."

"Answer me this London--- 2nd period---heading to gym---she'd always pass…"

We said it together "the stairs."

Then it dawned on me. "You were always there. Whitlock---did you like her too?"

"No man---that little freaky cousin of hers got my loins in a frenzy. But when you were always where I was---I noticed we shared the pattern."

I laughed. "Geez---I guess we're lucky nobody ever noticed either of us at all---or they'd have probably thought we'd had a thing for each other. I have a question for you, Whitlock."

"Then, my former comrade in outcast---I'll have an answer."

"How'd you know it was Bella I wanted?"

"Dude---it had to be. The way you stared at that young woman meant one of two things---either you were Jack the Ripper's offspring planning her demise or you were in love with her from afar. I put my money on the latter---despite the creepy coat.. And the way Bella looked at you screamed intrigue---until, of course big brother came along and plucked your flower just before spring."

"Asshole"

"Blasphemy from the prodigal son---it's a sin London. I don't know how you face him. So, I'd love to keep up the rendezvous down memory lane---but I need to start setting up for the band tonight. I'd love to pick this up some other time---you staying with your parents at their place?"

"No---um---I'm staying---with--- them." I couldn't even look up.

"Shit dude---that's pain---why?"

"Beats the fuck out of me."

After two hours of ale, conversation and a bunch of musical equipment kicking my ass, I left the pub feeling a bit better---a bit stronger.

Of course that could have been the beer.

I found myself back outside Emmett's office building---but this time ---I went in.

I located my brother's name on the directory near the elevator and headed to his office. I stared at his name on the door. Emmett Cullen, CPA

I opened the door to find a cubicle with a desk followed by another door. Sitting at the desk to greet me was my brother's secretary. She looked familiar. It's strange when you haven't seen people in years and they look familiar---but older.

Just as I closed the door, the phone rang. "Emmett Cullen's office. Yes, this is Rosalie. How can I help you?"

Rosalie. Fucking. Hale.

When she hung up the phone, Rosalie finally noticed my presence.

"Oh, I'm sorry--what can I….Edward Cullen!"

I nodded.

"Emmett mentioned the other night that you were coming home. Wow---you look different. I have to hear you talk----he said it's amazing."

"It's really nothing."

Rosalie looked at me with her mouth open just long enough for it to become awkward.

I spoke up. "My brother?"

"Oh---sorry---just go in."

I was only in my brother's office long enough for him to mumble something about dinner and Bella and having to work late. Before I knew it we were at a restaurant near their home where Emmett had already called in an order for take out.

"Edward---I really need you to help me out---I promised Bella a quiet dinner for two. But I have to get back to the office---it's really important. So can you stand in for me---please? Just have dinner with her---take her home. I shouldn't be too late."

I couldn't imagine what could be so urgent for a CPA---whose office was client-free when we left ---after tax season---after hours---but I agreed. Actually---I could imagine one thing he might consider urgent---in his office---after hours---but I chose not to go there. I'd save that for another day. I had my own issues to iron out.

My brother was a fool. I'd love to have dinner with Bella anytime---anywhere. I was just pretty certain---she wasn't going to feel the same way about me.

I followed Emmett in to find a smiling Bella sitting across the room alone. Well, she _was_ smiling--- until she saw me.

Emmett pleaded his case and she, of course, understood. The next thing I knew Emmett punched me on the arm and left.

Unsure what else to do, I sat down.

It was pain. The silence hovering that table was pain. She looked at me with disdain. Her eyes saw a lecherous rogue---I could see it in them. I had to be very careful.

I never looked up from the plaid cloth on the table. "I didn't plan it."

"What?" Her voice broke the dead silent void I'd been facing.

Finally! I was so relieved to hear her willing to address me and so nervous that I'd manage to ruin her, that I did what I always do when I'm panicky. I rambled.

"I was heading to the bathroom. I'd had a few beers---and needed to take a leak. I passed your door. I heard the sounds. I shouldn't have looked in---I knew that. But I couldn't help it. And I saw you---and I couldn't stop looking. I know I should have moved on---or closed the door. But I couldn't. I didn't want to. Then I saw--- your face. Bella, you looked so sad.

She stared at the table, too. "You shouldn't have been there. He's your brother for Christ's sake!"

I spoke with my heart, so I looked into her eyes. "I know. My behavior was deplorable. The problem is---I'm not sorry---and I can't guarantee I wouldn't do it again."

_Holy Shit---she's gonna hit me._

Good thing I was looking. I caught her wrist just before her hand could make contact with my face.

She needed to understand. I didn't want to hurt her. I wanted to help her, no matter what the cost. Looking as far into her soul as she'd allow, I assured her.

"Bella, you deserve pleasure."

At that, she let me in. Her eyes softened and I once again saw that smoldering heat in her chocolate brown eyes. But before I could even speak, she blocked me out, grabbed her purse and was running for the door.

_Damn! _

I caused her pain _again_. I should've just let her hit me.

Maybe she'd have felt better.

I waited for our dinners to be served and asked the waiter for Bella's to be boxed. I left mine on the table, paid the bill and started back to Bella's house, her dinner in a brown bag.

I thought about the visit with my mother as I walked home. Everything---everything spurred from a misunderstanding. A misunderstanding caused by me being to much of a pussy to take a chance. I realized that all of this was my fault. The way my entire life played out was my fault. If I'd only had the nerve to speak up---to say what was on my mind, all this confusion may never have happened.

I decided that today was the day to finally speak up. Bella was in an emotionless marriage. Emmett was probably screwing his secretary. And I was even more miserable than I'd been as a teen---and I hadn't thought that was possible. Yep---today was the day---tonight!

I got to Bella's house, and looked around. As expected, she was nowhere to be seen. I was fairly certain she'd escape to her room---in my short time home, I'd already established that as her pattern---her safe haven.

I climbed the stairs and waked straight to her room, steadfast. I took a moment to plan my words. Just as I was about to knock, Bella unexpectedly opened the door.

We each stood there wide-eyed for a moment---but I was determined---and afraid she'd lock me out---so I just took a few steps inside the door.

"Uh--Edward. I --I --don't think this is a good idea." Her hesitation fueled my apology.

"Bella, I was wrong. I was wrong to put you in an awkward position."

She had sat on the bed, so I sat with her. The fact that she didn't scream or run away, encouraged me. I focused on my goal, and regardless of the difficulty---I simply persevered. I just said it.

"I have a confession to make. I've been furious with Emmett for years. Everything that was difficult for me came easily to my big brother. I walked in his shadow and I was okay with that ---until winter break ---junior year. It was a rare occasion. He and I were bonding over a Grand Theft Auto video game we'd gotten for Christmas when he asked me why I never dated. Actually he said "You don't date. Don't you like pussy?" I confided in him that there was only one girl and that she didn't even know I existed. I told him it was you. I'd never told anybody else. He gave me a bunch of bullshit advice about being patient and waiting for you to come to me. Then---I start notice he's talking to you at school. At first I thought he was trying to help me out. Then he brought you home to meet the family in February. I was really pissed for a long time and I guess never forgave him for betraying me."

I fought back the tears of a hurt teenager when Bella put her hand atop mine.

Her voice was soft and understanding.

"Edward, I had no idea."

I needed her to know everything.

"But what I experienced with you last night, had nothing to do with my brother---or revenge---or anything. I'd love nothing more than make you feel like that every single night. Bella, you deserve so much more than what you have."

Bella's face changed but her tone remaining soft---unguarded. "Emmett is a good man and a wonderful husband. And he is very considerate of my needs."

Even she knew it wasn't true.

"Bella, I heard him ask you three different times how HE was doing---not how you were doing."

Those words stung---and she started to cry.

Impulsively, I took her into my arms as I'd dreamt I had so many times over the years. Her skin was soft and warm. Her hair smelled so good---like strawberries and flowers. I just wanted her to smile---to be happy---to be mine. I watched the tears flow and hoped they were cleansing her soul. She relaxed in my arms and it just felt natural--as it should always have been.

Bella looked up and turned her head toward me, and without any other thought, I leaned in and met her lips. It was truly sweet ambrosia. It was like nothing I'd ever known or could ever imagine. She was soft and warm and sweet. As our tongues met, I thought I'd lose my mind. Appreciative of what she offered, it only made me ache for more.

I heard from Bella a gasp---or a breath---whatever it was triggered a response I was not expecting. Unsure who initiated it, we were suddenly giving in to the wants and needs we'd both been harboring. Her hands knotted in my hair, her fingers pulling at my clothes, removing my shirt---her body wanting mine---wanting me.

Our bodies pressed so tightly to one another, I could feel the entirety of her figure and knew the exact moment her nipples pebbled against my skin. _She wanted my touch. _

My fingers enjoyed every inch of Bella's skin warm even through her thin gown. They traced their way down her tiny frame and settled on her until I watched my hand envelope her magnificent flesh and stroke her aroused peaks.

_Yes, sweet ambrosia._

_Shit_---the front door slammed shut.

Bella and I froze.

I didn't want to leave---I didn't ever want to leave that moment.

Then I saw Bella's worried eyes and she prompted me to go. I grabbed my shirt, straightened myself and slipped out.

Emmett met me at the foot of the stairs, shushed me, and motioned me to the kitchen.

"Bella okay?" He asked.

"Sure. Why wouldn't she be?"

"Well, you know---having to work late and all."

I lied. "Actually, she didn't mention you at all. We had a delightful dinner."

"Good---thanks. I appreciate you covering for me. I'll do the same for you someday---if you know what I mean." Then he laughed and headed up the stairs.

I needed to know what was going on---though I was fairly certain I knew with whom.

I went into the kitchen, grabbed a few slices of lunchmeat and started to pour a glass of soda when Emmett walked in and insisted I drink beer with him. He had a deck of cards in his hand. I hoped that meant we wouldn't be reliant tonight on small talk.

We weren't. Emmett did all the talking---about himself---and sports---and himself before begging me to tell him about my escapades with European women. I actually considered making up a few very bizarre scenarios in hopes that they'd either satiate his need or cause him to lose interest.

But then, to my rescue, was Bella. She came into the kitchen like a breath of fresh air. Fresh air filled with the scent of strawberries and flowers.

But Emmett continued on about the women---with Bella in the room---the inconsiderate swine!

So I took the opportunity to pay his wife a compliment.

"I assure you, there was nobody better than what you have, Bro"

It worked---she blushed. _Win._

Bella took me up on an offer of a beer and joined us for a few hands of poker and a few more beers. During the game, Bella and I played a game of our own involving stolen glances, flirtation and innuendos that went right over Emmett's head. She seemed to be having a good time and she was kicking both our asses at cards.

Bella caught me staring at her tits---and smiled. Emmett noticed.

"Ahh---she must have another good hand." Emmett said "She's smiling."

I teased with Bella a bit---to see how she would respond. "That looks like a frisky little smile. Perhaps you ought to take your wife upstairs."

"Bro---how hospitable would that be? The game isn't even over." Emmett said.

All the while gazing at Bella, I said "Don't worry about me. Just consider me a good EFing brother-in -law." I hoped she knew what I was doing. "Bella is the big winner tonight. Perhaps she should decide."

Bella and Emmett headed upstairs and I put away our snacks and cleared the beer bottles.

Luckily for me, my brother had not suddenly taken up locking his bedroom door---in fact, again it hung wide open. I hurried to my room slipped out of my clothes and briefs. I put on a pair of thin white lounging pants and that was all.

I stood in Bella's doorway and waited for her to look up.

My brother was all over her---no rhyme or reason for his actions. And there was my beautiful Bella---the good sport.

She looked for me and when our eyes met---she let out a soft moan. I immediately felt my arousal swell. She smiled, gazing through her lustful lids, and I realized we were connected---intentionally---emotionally.

Somehow, I knew at least a part of her belonged to me.

I needed to give something back. She was sharing her deepest most intimate self with me. It was only fair I reciprocate.

Not at all comfortable being an exhibitionist, I slowly slid one hand down the doorframe and across my thigh for her.

Chocolate eyes lazily watching, one eyebrow raised, I softly moved my hand across the thin white fabric until my palm rested completely on my aching cock. _Ooooooh. _

_Focus on her._

I watched Bella's face as I caressed myself --for her. Her eyes widened---and she shivered with the sensation of what I guessed to be a mild orgasm. _So turned on. _I loved seeing her this way. I needed to giver her more.

I slid my hand beneath my waistband, embraced my shaft and stroked it long, slow and hard--- for Bella. She didn't even try to hide her reaction. She moaned loudly. I wanted more than anything to share this with her. I watched her body's groove and timed my strokes to carefully match her rhythm. She adjusted as well to meet me and very quickly, we were moving together---in synchronicity---without even touching. It was masterful.

I throbbed for her kiss, her warm sweet kiss. I licked my lips and Bella gasped. I could see in her eyes she was ready. She whimpered and we both quickened our pace. Breaths rapid, biting back moans, gazes locked, bodies stiffening. Bella and I came together in a rapturous explosion of lust, desire ---and fulfillment. I stood and watched for just a moment as her body adjusted to the trembling and settled flat on the mattress, a sheen of perspiration settling on her skin. Then, I had to go. I would ache for her tonight---for her head on my shoulder---her kiss on my lips---her warmth on my body.

Tonight, I'd ache for her-----but, perhaps-----someday….


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for the rocking reviews for both ****Other Side of the Door ****and ****Open Door Policy****. A shout out to Milalencar, Jenn1987, DelaneyDawn, Reigny, WhiteMocha, miztrezboo and Emilyg80. The more you can tell me about what you like---or perhaps do not understand---is only helpful! Thanks in advance for REVIEWS!**

**As always---Twilight and its characters belong to Stephenie Meyer---I just bring them out to play!**

Ch. 3

I awoke with a smile at the crack of dawn following a peaceful night of the sweetest dreams. Dreams of my Bella.

Bella's eyes filled with emotion. Bella's smile reacting to our silent jokes. Bella's caress on my shoulder. Bella's body entwined with mine.

Last night had been the most amazing night of my life. Never had I ever felt so connected with anyone---not even Margie. She'd followed my lead. She'd waited for me. She'd wanted me. We were one---with a connection so great it needn't require physical contact.

As soon as I heard the front door slam, it was my cue to hop out of bed. I'd envisioned this morning in my mind so many times over the years. The morning after Bella and I made love for the first time, I would surprise her with breakfast in bed. Now, I'm not delusional. I knew we hadn't actually had intercourse---but the love that we made last night---was definitely with one another. And I needed to show her just how much I worshipped her ---body, mind and soul.

I took the stairs two at a time and spent a moment familiarizing myself with Bella's kitchen. I had to work fast. This had to be a surprise.

A loaf of sourdough bread was in the pantry, as was all the makings for a pot of coffee; which I immediately started. I opened the refrigerator and found a half dozen eggs, a pound of bacon and a quart of orange juice. After more thoroughly searching the back of the shelves, I discovered a jar of blackberry jam and a half bottle of champagne that the cork had been wedged back in. I gave it a slight shake and it bubbled to the top. Perfect.

Hanging above the stove were all the pans and utensils I needed. In a cabinet beside the stove, I found the cooking spray and seasonings.

I took a deep breath, and began. My hands were actually shaking. I wasn't exactly sure why, but I was pretty certain it had to do with adrenaline. I was excited and nervous and scared.

I was fairly sure Bella and I had a connection that was not simply a figment of my sometimes overactive imagination. We shared things---like we knew what the other needed or wanted---sometimes. Other times, Bella responded in ways I could never have predicted. I just hoped she would enjoy her breakfast with me, but I could also completely envision myself running from the room followed by a hurling of eggs, bacon and toast.

I exhaled deeply and decided to focus elsewhere. As bacon sizzled and eggs fried, I thought of our card game. The subliminal messages and inuendos that were flying around right here in this kitchen last night were certainly promising. Just a couple of beers. That's all it took for her to unwind and set her sexy, playful side free. She was so fucking adorable as she was kicking our asses in cards.

I set the pans down on warm and slid bread into the toaster. I noticed a small breakfast tray above the fridge, grabbed a beer bottle from the trash and rinsed it clean before filling it with water. I stepped just outside and picked a small grouping of cherry blossoms that I had noticed the day before. I arranged the flowers in my makeshift vase and set it on the tray. Not nearly as beautiful as the woman I was giving them to, but they'd have to do.

I turned my attention back to breakfast, spreading jam on the toast and flipping the eggs to be sure they weren't sticking. Remembering the mimosas I planned to make, I grabbed the OJ and champagne from the fridge and turned to look for glasses, only to find the sweetest face peering at me through the cracked door. I couldn't help but smile immediately when I saw her, although I wondered exactly how long she'd been there. I felt warmth spread through my face as I realized I'd actually been whistling as I worked---_Julia Fucking Childs in the kitchen---what a dork_.

"Hi. Hungry?" I asked, completely ready to bolt if her reaction was less pleasurable than I'd been hoping.

She smiled, looking uneasy but impressed. "It smells fabulous." _Oh thank God!_

I pulled Bella's chair out and she immediately sat down. Without even thinking, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, I found my lips meeting the top of her head with a kiss. I froze, afraid to breathe or move. Too many daydreams of this scenario left me feeling ridiculously comfortable with my husband's wife. I was terrified that perhaps I'd gone too far.

After a moment, when I realized she wasn't going to respond poorly, I proceeded to serve the woman who held my heart in her hands.

She ate everything, complimenting me throughout. She needn't say a word---her smile was all I needed.

"Edward, this is truly delicious, but you didn't have to make me breakfast."

"It's the least I could do---after all---you've been so hospitable." _Shit---that came out wrong!_

"Umm, Edward I need to talk to you." Her tone was soft but guarded.

I was afraid this was coming. _Here we go._

Bella took a deep breath and spoke, her eyes on the table. "What we've done is wrong. I feel terrible about it."

Terrible? No. How could she say it was wrong? It was beautiful and emotional and perfect. Remembering the sereneness of her face last night, I knew she---she must just be feeling frightened or cocnfused.

"You seemed to feel pretty good last night." I reminded her with a gentle smile.

An adorable shade of pink immediately filled her cheeks. "I'm not going to try to deny that. But we cannot continue doing this---to Emmett."

Fuck Emmett. Fuck Emmett who double crossed his own brother. Fuck Emmett who lies to his wife and spends his evenings with Rosalie Hale. Fuck anybody as selfish as my loathsome, deceitful brother.

I looked her directly in the eyes, swallowed hard, and held my breath. "Are you in love with him?"

Without hesitation or any emotion, Bella stated the obvious. "He is my husband."

_Wheeew, she can't even say it! _"You didn't answer my question." I hoped I didn't sound as pleased as I felt.

"Edward, I made a promise---in front of all our friends and family---I made a promise before God."

_Still not answering my question. _I hated how difficult this was for her. But she needed to recognize her own emotions.

Softly and gently I asked again. "Are you in love with him?"

"I wouldn't have married him if didn't love him." She did the cutest little eye-roll thing, which I am sure she did not intend to be cute.

"Are you **in** love with him **now**?" I persisted.

Silence settled on that room for too long. Bella seemed to be searching---as if the right answer was out there somewhere---but she just couldn't find it. Then she closed her eyes and I could easily read from her face what was coming next.

"I did---but now---." Tears fell from her beautiful eyes. Painful tears that I'd caused. Instinctively, I reached for her and pulled her to me. I held her close to my chest , cradling her head, stroking her hair---as if that could erase any of the hurt I'd just willfully caused.

I found myself rambling---reaching desperately for any words that may make her feel better. "It's okay sweetie. It's okay. You don't have to say anything you don't want to. I never want to hurt you--I promise. I'll do whatever you need. It's okay. I promise---it's okay." She was silent, nuzzling into my chest.

I opened my eyes. As I turned to see her face, my nose dragged along her cheek until my forehead leaned against hers.

_God, I loved this woman. _And hopefully He would forgive me.

I tilted my head slowly. Seeing no signs of dismay, I allowed my lips to press gently upon hers….and Bella pressed back_. I knew it. I knew it was right. _I felt my brow furrow as Bella leaned her chest into mine, deepening our kiss, I was so afraid of doing something to frighten or overwhelm her. But the next thing I knew our kiss had become erratic and passionate and desperate. Bella had wrapped her leg around my hip and I was reaching down to steady her--- when suddenly her entire body stiffened.

"Stop!" was all I heard before she backed away sobbing and ran for the door. I just stood there---stunned.

By the time I made it to the front steps she was already putting her car in reverse. I called for her to come back---not to cry---but she couldn't hear me. She was gone. _Dammit! _

I slowly closed the door and headed toward the kitchen to clean up my mess…._and what fucking a mess I'd made_.

I had to fix it---all of it. But I had no idea how. Then, I remembered someone with lots of ideas, freaky intuition and enough alcohol power to make me forget anything unpleasant. I put on my running shoes and headed in his direction.

I took me about 30 minutes to make it the 4 miles to Jasper Whitlock's little pub. He stood at the door smiling---like he had been expecting me.

"Ah Romeo---your Juliet refused the poison and set out on her way."

I had no idea what the hell he was talking about, so I just asked for a house draft.

He set the mug down before me as he chewed on a straw. "You have your sister-in-law in quite a state."

It took me a moment to realize he was referring to Bella---I'd never actually thought of her with that exact title before.

"Jasper---translation please---it's been a rough day and I'm just not computing."

"Your fair Bella. I found her in a less than noble state in the midst of the street. I took care of her for ya. Then I sent her on her way."

"Bella was here?"

"That** is** what I just said." He smirked---straw waving at me.

"Did she say anything---about me?" I asked---my heart in my throat.

"She didn't say many words---but her message was clear."

I waited for him to continue---which he did not.

Exasperated, my arms flailing, I reiterated. "Well---what did she say?!?"

Jasper straightened his shoulders, cleared his throat, took the straw from between his teeth and spoke with a slightly deeper tone. "I cannot disclose such information. That would be in violation of doctor patient confidentiality."

"Completely understandable---but Jasper **you're not a doctor**---you're a bartender---remember."

"That's bar OWNER---thank you. And I am a doctor ---of love. I will not jeopardize the faith of my patrons."

"Listen Whitlock---I have got to know what she's feeling---what she's thinking…"

"Don't worry my lovelost friend----Desperately Seeking Springer is now following her heart---and I think we both have a pretty good idea where that will lead---and if it doesn't, well…"

"Can you at least tell me which way she headed when she left?"

"Nope---sorry."

"Geez---I came here to speak with the closest thing I have to a friend in this town---and you won't even help me."

"I will tell you this----where would you go if you were trying to convince yourself that everything you've known to be true still is---whether you actually believe it or not?"

"Thank you, Confucsious---what the hell does that mean?"

"Well, I didn't see which way she headed---but my guess----is Emmett. Go---find your maiden, mighty knight, and convince her that you are the keeper of her heart." He smiled like he knew something I didn't and said "Good luck--- Edwierd."

I smiled back and patted his shoulder---planning to put all my chips on the possibility that whatever he was alluding to involved me, Bella and a happy ending. "Thanks, Whitlost."

As I walked toward my brother's building I noticed Bella's car on the street. I wasn't sure how I'd missed it before. I took the elevator up, in hopes of finding her---unable to help wondering what exactly she may be saying to Emmett and whether or not these would be some of my last breaths.

As I stepped off the elevator I could see Bella through the slightly opened door. She was speaking to Rosalie Hale. She was smiling---so my guess was she'd not caught them in any sort of hanky panky I'd suspected had been occurring. I stepped closer to the door and stopped just in time to hear Bella say " Rose---I actually came down here to invite you over for dinner tonight. Are you available?"

_Why the hell would Bella invite Rosalie Hale for dinner?_

"Are you sure---I don't want to be an imposition."

_Why the hell would she accept?_

"Don't be silly---I am positive. Emmett and I would love to have you." _What the fuck?_

What could Bella possibly be thinking?

_Emmett and I would love to have you?_

_Which would leave me…and Rosalie???_

**Oh Hale no!**


	4. Chapter 4

**I decided Edward had more to say---and it was his turn to go first. I hope nobody minds---I figure EPOV is always win! **

**Thanks for all the rockin' reviews!! Thanks to SeekingJamestown for including this fic and Open Door Policy on her C2 . Thanks to DelainyDawn for her ongoing support. Shouts out to Ms Rhymenoceros, Darcy13, Juliamine, and noellelilah. **

**Many are concerned about the wrongness of this affair---I promise it will all work out the way it should---interpret that as you wish---I hate to give anything away. There is still info to discover---and to a degree---each of the 4 characters in the tangled mess is a victim of sorts. My personal life experience will not allow me to glorify adultery---so breathe a sigh if needed.**

**Thanks to lovingit for starting an Open Door Policy thread on Twilighted---it seems I'm the only one popping in over there lately---so stop by!**

**I am leaving Monday on vacation---so you won't hear from me until after I get back the following Monday. I promise to behave in NY---even if I see the beautiful one.**

**I love reviews---they are better than chocolate---well almost!**

**As always---Twilight is Stephenie's---I only play with her characters.**

Ch. 4

I needed a doctor or a stiff drink and knew exactly where to go.

"Back so soon, Romeo? Was the fair maiden----shit man---you are white as a sheet?"

I just sat on the tall wooden stool, allowing the bar to hold me up.

"Here" Whitlock said as he handed me a shot glass filled with something golden. "This should do the trick."

I downed it---burning the shit out of my throat. "Fuck---what the hell is that---rat gut?"

"My own secret creation---a man born too late---should've been around during prohibition."

"Yep Jas---drunks would've loved you---right before their stomachs fell out their assholes. I don't even want to know what's in that shit." I predicted mothballs and hairspray from the flavor.

"It brought you back from the land of funk--didn't it?" He smiled---obviously pleased with himself---straw dancing wildly.

"Looks like I'm being set up tonight with Rosalie Hale." I divulged flatly while staring at a picture of a scantily dressed German girl holding a stein behind the bar. "Me, Rosalie, my brother and his wife."

"Rosalie Hale---the one and the same from school---- known for her many extracurricular activities---only some of which were actually permitted in the yearbook?"

"That'd be her. And my big brother --- her personal MVP."

"Then or now?"

"I'm pretty sure---both."

"You think Bella has this planned---trying to out the old man?"

"No---Bella is very easy to read---she hasn't a clue about them. If she did, she wouldn't get so upset about what she's feeling about me."

"Holy shit---that's gonna be one helluva dinner."

"Yeah---I may not even show up." _That'd show her._

"Oh---He Who Holds All the Cards---you must---and may I suggest you bring a guest?"

I looked at him---puzzled---which had become nothing unusual during my conversations with Dr. Whitlost. "Jasper, if you _really_ want in on this fiasco…"

"Not me---although it is tempting---to be but a fly on the proverbial wall. I'm referring to a guest--- dressed ---in green."

I shook my head. "Maybe it's the rot gut---but I'm just not following."

"All your fucked-up dinner date needs to be complete is the green-eyed monster to make an appearance and rear its ugly head. And you, my friend, are just the man to ensure it does---if you wish to do so."

I grabbed the second cup of rot gut that Jasper had waiting for me on the bar and downed it fast---trying not to taste a thing. _It was definitely mothballs and hairspray---With just a touch of vanilla?_

After breathing out what felt like a mouth full of fire, I found myself nodding my head. And apparently Whitlock's incessant grinning with that stupid ass straw in his mouth had proven to be infectious---because, as I could see in the mirror behind the bar, I was now grinning, too.

When I got back to Bella's, she was busy bustling around the kitchen. There were grocery bags completely covering the kitchen table.

"Need some help?" I asked courteously---keeping up my front. I hated to be in any way deceptive with her---but I was so very pissed off at her for even thinking for one moment that I could be easily passed on to another---that my feelings for her were so ---generic.

"Umm---no. I think I've got it. You just need to get dressed for dinner tonight. We're having a guest—so, umm—look nice?" _Look nice? For Rosalie Hale? Fuck that._ She never even looked at me---just continued putting things in the pantry.

I got to my room and grabbed a pair of jeans and my favorite plaid shirt from the closet and laid them across the bed. Looking up I caught my own reflection in the mirror atop the bureau---and smiled. I put the jeans and shirt back into my closet and dug a little further toward the back. I grabbed the suit I had purchased before I decided not to attend my brother's wedding. Black pants and jacket, white shirt and thin black tie. I think that would just about do it.

I enjoyed a hot shower---washing away all the stress, frustration and fear; not to mention the unique pungent odor of Jasper's concoction----for which I just may have been developing an acquired taste.

I ran some gel through my hair and planned to just let it dry---_was there any other way?_ I reached for my clothes before realizing I had no idea what time dinner was planned for---and I certainly didn't want to risk wrinkling my clothes before my big dinner date. Since I hadn't heard Emmett's voice yet, I deducted he must not be home. I wrapped my towel around my waist---water still beading on my shoulders---and jogged downstairs. I opened the kitchen door wide and propped myself against the wall. I waited for Bella to notice me---and much to my delight I actually heard a gasp---I like to think it hadn't to do with me scaring her.

"Ummmm Edward----I didn't see you there." Her face was pallid and here eyes were huge.

I caught myself chewing nervously on my lip before asking "What time will our guest be arriving?"

"She'll be here at 6." Her eyes were still enormous and not exactly looking away.

"Mmmm---she huh? Anyone I know?" Okay now I was being just a little cocky---but it felt---justified.

Her forehead wrinkled and she blinked a few times before turned her entire body away from me. "You may---she graduated with us---Rosalie Hale?"

I wanted to say "_I do remember Rosalie---I remember my junior year when I caught her and Emmett fucking against a tree in the woods behind my house_." But instead I said "Rosalie! Of course I remember her--- how could I forget the head cheerleader? I understand she never married. How nice. It'll be wonderful to see her again."

I couldn't look at Bella---as much as she may have deserved to have the tables turned on her---and as oblivious as she was regarding exactly what kind of wildfire she was sparking here tonight---I still felt really bad intentionally causing her pain.

I went back upstairs and got dressed. When I heard the door slam followed by my brothers bellowing "We're here." and Bella's voice meeting them in the foyer, I chose my opportunity to join my dinner date. Glancing quickly into the mirror, checking for---I don't even know--- I headed toward the stairs.

It was like a scene from a debutante ball. As I descended the stairs, all eyes were on me. _Pretty hilarious._

Emmett looked at me like I was from another planet and Bella and Rosalie Hale stood with their mouths agape.

I whisked right past Bella, breathing deeply to at least take advantage of enjoying her sweet scent, before I took Rosalie's hand and gently kissed the top. The only one to make a peep was Rose---but all that came out of her were a string of unintelligible of words.

I broke the silence. "Rosalie you look absolutely lovely tonight---you haven't changed the slightest bit since high school."

Getting her thoughts together, Rosalie spoke. "Thank you Edward. You are looking quite handsome yourself. You, on the other hand, look quite different---you have grown up quite beautifully."

From the looks on Emmett's and Bella's faces, I was certain if it were socially acceptable for them to stick their fingers toward their throats in a "gag me" fashion, they would each have done so.

"Bella, how long before dinner is ready?" I asked.

Still stunned, Bella replied "Oh, at least 20 minutes."

"Perfect. Rosalie, would you care to take a walk in the garden with me? Bella keeps a lovely garden."

"I would love that." Rosalie extended her elbow, which I appeared to graciously accept before escorting her to the back door.

Once we were alone, she spoke first. "Edward, you are absolutely charming and for Bella to think of me like this was far nicer than perhaps she needs to be. But, I am sorry. I'm somewhat taken."

_Cha-ching_! "Oh, that is a shame. I was under the impression that you were not dating anyone."

"Well, I'm not---exactly. But I don't consider myself free either. It's quite complicated" _I bet it is._

"Rosalie, I'm going to be very blunt with you. Does it happen to involve my brother?"

She suddenly resembled a deer you might pass on the highway at night trying to find its way beyond the headlights. "How---could---you---possibly…"

"It wasn't terribly difficult to figure out. As soon as I saw you in Emmett's office I had my suspicions. I just cannot believe you actually came here tonight---after disrespecting Bella in such a way."

"I know what I feel is wrong---but I have worked very hard NOT to disrespect Bella----even though I've very much wanted to."

"How can you say that while you're having a physical relationship with her husband?"

"I'm not doing anything physical with Emmett."

_Oh shit. _And then Rosalie Hale stated to cry._ I seemed to be having that effect on ladies a lot recently._

I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and patted it.

"I'm sorry Rosalie, I didn't mean to imply…"

"No---you couldn't help if you noticed something. It's not your fault I'm living a lie."

"Oh, I'm sure your not…"

"I am. I've never gotten over Emmett. Bella somehow decided I was a good choice to work for her husband, and I jumped at the chance---even though I knew better. We were an item, you know---back in high school."

I smiled and shook my head. I could tell she liked thinking back upon her glory days.

"Em was football captain and I was head cheerleader. I was so in love with him. But I had to keep our relationship a secret because my mom was hell-bent on me staying focused on school---I wasn't even allowed to date. Em and I had so much fun together. I remember sneaking behind the gym at school dances after all the big games---and taking long walks in the woods behind your folks place. We stole moments whenever we could. I never thought I'd be in anybody's arms but Emmett's."

I noticed a shine to Rosalie's eyes when she remembered the good old days, although the hint of sadness was still evident in her tone.

"But then one day I show up at school and he's holding hands with Bella Swan. I never even saw it coming. I hated her for a really long time. But then I realized---it wasn't her fault. She had no idea. That's why I should never have taken the job---but I still really liked being around Emmett. When we were alone in that office---it hints of the good times from years ago---in an innocent way mostly. I should've known I was playing with fire. I'm a good church-going girl---and even though I don't make all the right decisions all the time---I would not become physically involved with a married man. The only problem is ----I was already emotionally involved with him---which was equally as sinful. I know it would only take the slightest encouragement from me---which I'd never do. But sometimes---when we're kidding around in the office---Emmett leans in a little too closely---or brushes my cheek with his thumb. Twice, before I could even stop him, he kissed me---and I didn't hate it. I've felt really bad about that. He makes up reasons for us to be at the office late. One of these days---I'm afraid I won't be strong enough…I---I'm going to quit. I have to---there's no other choice."

I didn't know what to say. I had thought Rosalie was a villain in our tangled mess---when, in actuality---she was more of a victim than any of us. And she'd at least worked hard to more or less take the high road. I looked at Rosalie with new eyes. She was actually respectable.

"Edward. Have you ever gotten over Bella?"

_What? Too stunned for words, I'm sure my mouth resembled that of a trout just reeled in---gasping for air._

Rosalie attempted a smile and said softly. "I won't tell---if you won't."

I continued to examine her with questioning eyes.

"Esme showed me the tree out back. She is so proud of her supposed involvement in the union of her son and his wife. My mother and I were there for a Women's Club meeting about a year ago. She showed us."

"How do you know it wasn't Emmett?"

"Pleeease---the only wood working Emmett was concerned with in high school was what was going on under his pants. There's no way he went to that sort of trouble for anybody. It was far more his style to try and leave his mark on a girl's neck. I can see it all over your face---you still love her---don't you?"

I sighed deeply and extended my arm as my eyes saw a totally different Rosalie Hale---my newest comrade. "Well, this is an interesting turn of events---isn't it?"

She took my arm. "It sure is. Looks like we each smoked out the other tonight."

As we walked back toward the door to the house I raised a very important question as Rosalie's eyes met mine with great interest. "Ah yes, but what do we do now?"

"I say, let the games begin."


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay---it's a short update---but I plan to begin working right now on the Open Door Policy chapter. I just needed to speak from both POVs right now. So check back later for an ODP update, too!! **

**Also---if you are reading this fic---you need to also read Open Door Policy---it is Bella's POV of this story. I discovered in reviews---some of you have only been getting one side of the story.**

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**I just posted a new for the Love Through Lemons contest mostly because the thought of the fucktastic author judges actually reading my shit---makes me sqeeeeee! It's called Mating Calls and Monkey Wrenches. It is a Rosalie/Emmett fic---and face it---I owe Emmett some love! I'm crazy anxious to know what you think.**

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**As always---Stephanie owns it all---I just wish I did!**

**_______________________________________________________________________**

"Well this is odd." Rosalie whispered once we'd purposely entered the dining room giggling, only to find a lonely lasagna in the center of a beautifully set table, not a soul in sight.

I offered Rosalie a chair, taking my seat next to her. She smiled at me, winked and placed her hand on top of mine on the table for all to see. _Oh this was going to be fun!_

I whispered into her ear "So, what is the game plan?"

"Well, I guess that depends on how upset you are with Bella." She said, showing her dimples.

"I'd definitely like to give her a show." I admitted.

"Then a show it is. I can't wait to see their faces once the tables are turned." She said as she entwined her fingers with mine, all for their benefit.

We sat there at the table with the lasagna for more than 15 minutes, all the while expecting our perfect hostess to appear with a big bowl of salad, a bottle of wine, or a basket of bread. Neither Bella nor Emmett returned. The longer we sat there, the more concerned I became. I looked at Rosalie and we both stood, walking toward the kitchen tentatively. Nobody.

We peeked into the kitchen. Nobody. I called up the stairs, "Boy that lasagna sure smells great." Nothing.

Rosalie patted my shoulder and pointed in the direction of the family room. Sure enough, the distant sound of ESPN.

I opened the door just a crack. Both of us peeked in. The room was completely dark, except for the glow of the television. My brother was sitting in the shadows, arms across his chest, socked feet propped on the coffee table. He was in his t-shirt and slacks, dress shirt discarded next to him on the floor. My eyes immediately scanned the room for the person I was really looking for. She was nowhere to be seen. This was not good.

"Hey, Bro?" His eyes remained glued to the screen, his mouth a tight straight line. "Looks like dinner's ready. Where's Bella?"

Never taking his eyes off the TV, he swallowed hard and then answered; his voice monotone and lacking any hint of emotion "Don't know. Heard the door shut a while ago. Guess she left."

Trying again, I said calmly "What do you mean she left? Where might she have gone?"

He simply shrugged, not to be bothered with words.

What the fuck? I could feel my insides begin to boil as the heat made its way up into my face. His wife left---he doesn't appear to care---and he has no idea where she is.

"You mean to tell me your wife just left---without saying a word---and you don't have any idea where she is?" Nothing. "Emmett, do you even give a shit?"

That's when I noticed the half empty bottle of Jack Daniel's on the coffee table.

Rosalie's squeezed my arm. It was too late.

He was ready to blow.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Who the hell are you, _little brother_, to have any opinion on my life at all! You have no fucking clue. You go away to your foreign college, escape any expectations---not that anyone expected anything from you anyway. And now you're going to stand there and what---**you** got marital advice for **me**, Ed---wieeerd? You don't know shit --- even with your top-fucking-notch college education and your prissy accent."

He was just getting started, his fire fueled by whiskey which was evident now by the slur of his words.

"What the hell do you know? You don't shit about shit. Everything came easy for you---you and your art classes and your volunteer work and that stupid fucking trench coat you hid in all the damn time. You've probably never made a real decision in your life. Hell---I wouldn't be surprised if you still have your fucking cherry---baby brother. And you're gonna have an opinion on my life---that's fucking rich."

I hadn't seen this Emmett since high school. Back then, I would have retreated to my room until the dust settled, but not today.

"Fuck you Emmett. You don't even know me. You never bothered to know me. So you have no right to have an opinion about me. And for your information, I know a hell of a lot more than you think I do. At least I know how to fuckin' please a woman."

I knew that was hitting below the belt---using information I'd discovered in confidence—information that could really hurt Bella---and I felt bad about betraying her confidence. But my brother knew just how to push my buttons.

Rosalie whispered "Let's just go Edward. There's no rationalizing with him when he's like this."

That's when his eyes turned to her. They were filled with anger and hate and pain.

"You planning to find out, Rose?" He growled through clenched teeth.

"Excuse me?" Rose said. I wasn't sure if she truly didn't hear him, or was just taken back by the implication.

"Aaare you planning to **fuck **Edwierd, now?"

I saw the tears welling in Rosalie's eyes as she spoke. "How dare you Emmett? How fucking dare you?"

"Aw c'mon--- you could find out who really is better? Then you could let us know."

I wrapped my arm around Rosalie's waist, in an attempt to guide her out, before my brother spoke again. I was too late.

"What happened to us Rose?" His tone had changed, now sorrowful and softer.

Rose looked at me, her big round eyes searching for the right thing to say. I answered for her.

"You went after Bella. You didn't care who you hurt."

The full effect of the bourbon must have kicked in, because Emmett's next words came out in enormous sobs. "I know. I know. I'm an asshole. I'm sorry. It was the only way. I didn't know what else to do. I'm sorry Rosie. And for what I did to you too, Edward."

_What?_

He knew. He knew and he fucking remembered. And he'd just apologized?

I felt like someone hit me in the face with a brick.

I had resigned myself to the fact long ago that my older brother was just not a very empathetic or thoughtful guy. I'd always chalked his actions up to him being more than a bit egocentric and, because of that trait, he hadn't really paid attention to what I'd said to him. I spent years trying to convince myself that Emmett's pursuing Bella was not an intentional betrayal.

But, it turns out my brother had always known exactly what he did. When he asked Bella out the first time: he knew. When he invited her to our home for Thanksgiving: he knew. All the times I tried to fucking avoid him: he knew. When he encouraged me to stay with him and Bella here after college: he knew.

I'm not sure how long I stood there drowning in a sea of pain and remembrance, realization and vindication. But the next time I looked at my brother, he was cradled in Rosalie's arms, crying into her chest as she stroked his hair. If I was able to feel anything at all at that moment, I might have felt a little sorry for him, but probably not. He didn't deserve what he was getting from Rose---and she certainly didn't deserve all she'd gotten from him.

At that moment, the house phone rang. I looked at Emmett. He never even flinched. My thoughts turned to Bella and her safety and I hurried to put the receiver to my ear.

"Hello?"

"London, thank the gods!"

It was Jasper Whitlock. How the hell did he get this number?

"Romeo, my brother, you mustn't tarry."

The normally poised Whitlock was in a state of panic.

"Come in haste---please! It's your fair Juliet---she is destroying my establishment!"

**Hee hee hee---I bet you're curious.**

**Remember---****reviews**** make me want to write faster!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you so much to those who keep following both sides of this story. **

**In case anyone has been missing out---this is Edward's side of the story---and you can read Open Door Policy to get Bella's POV. I also posted an outtake in Emmet's POV in a fic I am calling ****Knock, Knock. Who's There?**** I am saving that space for future updates in POVs other than Bella and Edward. I can totally see a Whitlost outtake coming!!!**

**I know I don't respond to all reviews---but I read EVERY one of them---in fact I obsess over them! Thank you for your kind words and for enjoying these characters with me!**

**This is totally unbeta'd---so if you see an error---message me, please! **

**As always---Twilight belongs to Stephenie---the EFing Brother-in-law is mine!!!**

I stood with the phone to my ear for several seconds after Jasper hung up. I couldn't imagine why Bella had left the house in the first place---or why she would go straight to Whitlock's Bar. On my way out the door, I noticed Bella's purse on the hall table. She must have left in such haste she just forgot it. Instinctively, I grabbed it up along with Emmett's keys—he certainly wasn't driving anywhere.

My mind raced like crazy between the house and Whitlock's. I couldn't forget the urgency of Jasper's words: "Come in haste …she is destroying my establishment."

What the hell could she possibly be thinking? I ran back through the evening. Admittedly, I was a bit shitty to her about being set up---playing her own ploy against her in what I honestly thought was a lame attempt to make her jealous by implying that I was interested in female company. But she WAS the one who set the whole thing up. I also dressed to the hilt on purpose---but SHE did tell me to look nice. I had noticed a sort of lifelessness to her eyes as I ignored her and showered it on for Rosalie. But--- I was only responding to the evening SHE initiated. But then, she left without a word. Emmett didn't seem to imply they'd had a fight or anything. He was angry and jealous over the thought of me and Rosalie together. Certainly Bella wouldn't have that extreme a reaction ---over me?

Fuck, I feel so sick to my stomach. The last thing I intended was to seriously cause her any pain. I just needed her to feel---what I know we both feel. I was selfish---I never considered what this could be doing to her. She had a lot more to lose than I. Yep, I was a selfish bastard---not much better than my brother. I had to get to her. I had to fix this and make it better for Bella.

My car just wasn't moving fast enough to get me where I needed to be until finally I pulled Emmett's SUV into the spot behind Bella. As I walked toward the bar, I was relieved. No smoke. No fire. No police. No people frantically fleeing from the building. Just the rhythmic flashing of the Whitlock's sign.

I got to the door, wrapped my fingers around the handle, took a deep breath and pulled it open. My eyes scanned the entirety of the room, filtering out the sea of broken glass covering every inch of the floor, making my search for Bella even more frantic. Finally, I found her---cross-legged---on top of the bar---tears streaming down her cheeks. Fuck! What the hell happened?

I worked my way to her---wading through the shards---until I was able to climb atop the bar and wrap my arm around her shoulder. "Bella---honey. It's okay."

"Stay away from me---you---you---MAN!" She reeked of liquor and every word was slurred. Geezus, I hoped Jasper hadn't given her any of his Rotgut.

"Sweetie---its okay---I'm here. Just tell me…"

"No! You tell me! Wheeeere's Rose-a-lay?" She asked---tears still streaming.

"She's still at your house. When we got the call from Jasper…"

"Jazzper! You traitor---I thought you were on my side---but you're all the same---just one more slippery male."

Jasper shuffled his way through the littered glass. "My deepest apologies London. It seems everything is well now. So sorry to have disturbed your ---date."

He was fucking smirking at me. Fucking Whitlost was enjoying this and it was his damn idea for me to play it up with Rose in the first place.

I whispered---"What's so fucking funny man---this night was a disaster."

In his frigging Confucius tone he said "This night was a sheep in wolf's clothing my friend---a sheep in wolf's clothing."

If I'd not been so concerned for Bella---I'd have smacked the shit right out of him just for being so damn ambiguous.

"What the hell happened here?" I asked.

"Well, Romeo, I'm not completely certain. I was totally jamming to some righteous bluesy tunes on the keyboard when I noticed the Fair Maiden becoming agitated by one of my regulars who I wish wasn't. My intention was to provide rescue for the damsel in distress, but she had already dismissed the irritant. The next thing I knew, the Lovely Bella was screaming profanities of infidelity and hurling tableware."

"Infidelity? What did she say?"

"I couldn't get a coherent word out of her---CAN YOU IMAGINE? And that, my friend, is when I called you." He said with a smile.

"I really appreciate you calling, Jasper. I definitely owe you one. And please, let me know the amount of the damages. I insist on repaying you."

"Oh---there is a favor I will ask ---but not at this moment. As for monetary payment---not a chance, my chivalrous chap. Your Dear Juliet made me a mint this evening."

I shook my head. "I-I'm not following, Whitlock."

"Once Miss Bella began crashing glassware, I noticed a large group in the back following suit. Except with each crash of a dish, I heard the word "Opa!" Would you believe there happened to be a Greek Businessman's convention in Forks this weekend? The Gods were smiling upon Master Whitlock tonight. I tell you, my brother, I sold a shit load of Ouzo this lovely evening. In honor of your ingenious lady, I am implementing a weekly Greek night---$2 Ouzo shots---BYOD---bring your own dishes. I've already got a bid in on a Bouzouki on EBay. I'll just need to learn how to play it."

I looked from Jasper---grinning like an idiot---to Bella---sitting on the bar all drunk and cute---totally pissed off at me --along with all males it seemed---and just shook my head.

"C'mon Bella. Get down. I'll get you home." I said.

"I'm NOT going anywhere with YOU." She crossed her arms at her chest and let out a heavy breath. "Humph!"

_She's so damn cute._ "Why not?"

"Cuz you're mmmmean."

_Awe---so cute._ "Bella, I could never be mean or in any way malicious to you---if my behavior tonight…"

"Your behavior tonight was disgusting. You and Rose-a lay. What's she got that I don't? Why does everybody want her?"

"Honey---I DON"T want her."

"But Emmett does! ---maybe he always has."

With that her chin began to quiver, the corners of her mouth drooped, her eyes filled with tears and my heart broke for her. In that moment I knew that Bella was no longer protected from the truth. She knew. She knew about Emmett's feelings for Rosalie. She knew she had more or less thrown the two of them together. Now, she knew her marriage really was not as it had seemed. And I knew she was hurting. And I knew there wasn't anything I could do for her to make that hurt go away as I watched her tears slowly make their way down her cheeks.

Bella sat lost in her thoughts and her tears, whimpering quietly. I slid my hands under her and pulled her up into my arms. She complied by allowing her head to fall onto my shoulder. Even in the midst of chaos, I couldn't resist leaning in, breathing deeply and smelling her skin, her hair. Beneath the aroma of smoke and alcohol, it was all Bella.

She continued to sob silent tears as I held her close, like a small child, and carried her out of the bar. Jasper tagged along silently beside me---opening doors and helping where he could. Once we got Bella settled into the passenger seat of her car, the silence was broken.

When he spoke, Jasper's voice was filled with concern. "London---there are some things we gents just cannot do for the fairer sex. And just as Juliet had her maid, Angelica---your Bella is fortunate to have a lovely confidant of her own, who may be better able to soothe your damsel's ailing spirit."

I smiled at my friend. "I get what you're saying Jasper---which, quite frankly scares the hell out of me. And, don't worry---I've got your back, my friend."

With that I walked over to Emmett's SUV, grabbed Bella's purse and handed it to Jasper. "It sure would be a shame for Bella to be distraught tomorrow over a lost purse. I'm sure her phone is in there. I bet you can find a listing on speed dial for someone close to Bella who'd gladly race over to your fine establishment to retrieve it for her. She'd probably also appreciate all you've done for her cousin once you fill her in on all the details---perhaps over a cup of coffee. Tell Alice she can catch up with Bella and me at the house."

Whitlock grinned from ear to ear, threw an arm around my neck and patted my back with the other--- quite strongly for a smaller guy. I could've been mistaken, or it could have been the smoke inside the bar---but Jasper's eyes appeared to be more than a bit watery as he waved and walked away.

Every Romeo deserves his Juliet.

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**Yep---you diehard Jasper fans ---will finally be getting your Alice! **

**Now---go---run---REVIEW!!**

**All reviewers get to bust a dish at Whitlock's! "Opa!!"**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer. I just like playing with her characters.**

**Thanks to all who consistently read and review! I appreciate each and every one---and live for that little message in my Inbox!**

**Serious thanks to my beta for this chapter---emilyg80. This one is truly a "greene/tea" collaboration!**

**I have written an entry in the Parkaward Contest. It is called The Metamorphosis and it is a sweet story about a very adorkable Edward. I'd love to hear what you think of it---and if you feel so inclined, I'd totes appreciate your vote.**

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As I pulled up in front of the house, I wasn't sure what to expect. Emmett's truck was still at Whitlock's, so the house appeared empty. It was still and dark…pretty much serene. At least that's how it appeared from the car as I sat next to a sleeping Bella.

Poor Bella. She was fast asleep by the time I'd pulled out of the space in front of the bar. The entire way home, she laid still, except for tiny murmurings. She startled me more than once in the silent car with slurred whispers of "Why?" , "Stop." and "Stupid.". But it was the purring sound of "It's okay" from her lips that gave me hope for her and for us.

The big question occupying my thoughts and weighing on my mind: What now? I knew she'd need time to heal, and I had every intention of giving her all the room she needed. But I would never disappear. I couldn't even fathom just letting her go. I'd prefer to be a surrogate brother, a simple remnant of a failed marriage, than nothing at all.

One thing I knew for sure. My brother was such a fool. I'd spent years dreaming and fantasizing about having a life with Bella, wishing she could somehow be mine complete with a "Happily Ever After". Emmett had it all. But he never appreciated it, wanted more and finally fucking blew it. If I could only be so lucky as to possess Bella's affection, I'd never leave her side.

I lifted my sleeping beauty out of the passenger seat and carried her up the long front walk. She nuzzled into my neck, where I could feel her breathing. I so wanted to kiss away all the hurt, uncertainty and pain. But I knew that would have to wait for another day. For now, I just needed to be a safe place, _her safe place. _Someone who expected nothing, but gave unconditionally.

After stumbling up the walk and fumbling with Bella's key, I opened the front door to find the only light in the place coming from the TV in the family room. It still buzzed with game scores and the plays of the day. I could hear the even breaths of peaceful slumber coming from a bundled up lump of blankets on the couch. Asshole. He deserved nothing peaceful. I fought the urge to walk right in there and beat the hell out of him in his sleep. But, that would imminently result in _my own _pain. So, instead, I climbed upstairs with _his _wife in _my _arms.

As I slowly ascended to the second story, holding tightly to my slumbering Bella, painful images flooded my mind. I was instantly 16 again and had just gotten home from sketch class. Being the last one off the bus, it had dropped me off right in front of my childhood home. Neither Mom's nor Dad's cars were in the garage and Emmett wasn't planted in front of the TV, so I assumed the house was empty. I made myself a ham sandwich and poured a glass of soda before sitting down to watch Cheers reruns on television. That's when I heard the laughter coming from upstairs. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Emmett carrying Bella down . She was kissing him, and his hands were all over her. I remembered the knot in my stomach and how I'd felt like I'd wanted to vomit. Just reflecting back, made me queasy.

But I reminded myself that it was the dawn of a new day. I could just feel it. I mean, Bella did have feelings for me---she must. Certainly she wouldn't get jealous of my actions, if she didn't feel something. Besides, it was up to me now. I would take care of her in her hour of need. I could do this; I had to do it. For her. And, in a way, I had a feeling that she would want it to be me who took care of her.

I carefully carried Bella to her room. I planned to tuck her in and hoped she'd remain asleep for the rest of the night. She deserved some peace. There would be plenty of time to sort everything out in the morning. As I approached the bed, I noticed a foot sticking out from under the blanket. Emmett.

I should have guessed that the camouflaged bundle in the family room was Rosalie. I'd taken Emmett's truck---leaving her no way to get home. At least they weren't tangled up together. I was sure that was thanks to Rosalie's self control and high moral fiber.

I stood at the foot of Bella's bed, her lifeless form in my arms, uncertain what to do. I couldn't have her wake to find herself lying next to Emmett.

It had never dawned on me not to bring her home. I suppose I could have called Alice. But this was her home. And I wanted to stay with her. I needed to be the one to save her.

Considering the circumstances, I did the only thing I could. I carried her to the guest room; to _my room_. I tossed the clothes I'd originally planned to wear to dinner off the bed, pulled down the covers and gently rested Bella's body with her head on my pillow.

She was so beautiful lying there in my bed. I smiled, thinking of how the pillow would retain her scent. I looked forward to the dreams it might induce during nights to come. My heart was flooded with emotions--pride, joy, lust, hope. Such a simple thing: Bella innocently sleeping in my bed. So simple, yet so unattainable---until now. Just the thought of having Bella in my bed---no, OUR bed, made my heart sing.

I stared at her beautiful face: eyes closed, forehead smooth; not a worry. I gently freed a strand of her hair entangled in her necklace, leaned down to within an inch from her head and breathed deeply. Sweet, floral and fruity. Absolutely intoxicating. I edged just a bit closer and pressed my lips to the top of her head, whispering "Sweet dreams, my Bella. Until tomorrow."

As I stepped back and opened my eyes, her large brown eyes were staring back at me---coherently. Startled, I staggered back and tumbled to the floor, banging my head on the corner of the nightstand on my way down.

"Oh God, Edward!" Bella leapt from the bed, her hands suddenly moving from holding her own head to propping mine. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Just a little bump." I smiled, not so much because I was particularly happy, but rather because she was simply there.

Bella lay with me, her hands in my hair for a few moment that felt like forever. Then, I watched as the realization of the night's happenings flooded her face.

Eyes wide, her complexion paled and her brow furrowed. She leaned closer to me, concentration evident. I stared into her eyes, watching the expression change. Just when I expected her to speak, Bella kissed me; wild, passionate, her hands exploring my neck, my hair, my back.

Impulse had me reciprocating furiously, until I realized what this was about. _Revenge._

Very gently, channeling the kind of strength that enables storybook heroes to slay the beast, I pulled back and away.

Her eyes met mine full of wonder, disappointment , defeat. Her chin began to quiver and I studied her eyes until the tears began to fall. Then, I did my best to kiss away every single one.

Her words came out in random bits and pieces. "I just thought…..I should have known better. Why would you want ? … I mean, I'm such a mess."

"Bella, no! I have wanted you for so long and with such longing and intensity. I _want_ this…just not like _this_." I placed one hand on either side of her face, making certain I had her complete attention. "You'll need to face him tomorrow. And I want you to be strong and blameless, and as innocent as possible."

Her tears stopped and her face became quite serious, although she remained silent.

"If this is something that you still want when all is said and done, _and God how I hope you do_, I will be here for you. I will always be wherever you need me."

"Edward, please…kiss me? Just a kiss? I just…I so need…just something." Her words were desperate and full of insecurity.

I traced my thumb along her brow, entangling my fingers in her long brown strands. Leaning forward, I placed the most passionate and sincere kiss on her forehead. Everything I felt---every emotion, though tightly controlled, was contained in that one innocent kiss. She folded limply into my arms, snuggling close, her cheek against mine. I could feel her quiet tears in the movements of her torso, the dampness of her face. She sobbed silently, all the while rubbing her smooth cheek against my stubble. I wrapped her in my arms, encasing her tightly until every last tear dried and she fell back to sleep in my embrace, right there on the floor. Momentarily perfect.

I hadn't even realized I'd dozed off until woke with a start to find Rosalie's silhouette in the doorway. Her hand was covering her mouth and her face held a look of surprise.

Immediately I put my finger to my lips and tended to Bella, assuring her slumber hadn't been interrupted. She was still resting peacefully. I carefully disentangled our bodies and escorted Rosalie into the hall.

"Don't tell me…you two…" Rosalie whispered in the kind of voice that was louder than a normal tone but quieter than yelling.

Shaking my head, I took her hand and led her further away. We went down the stairs and into the kitchen. I poured us each a glass of water.

"She found out about you and Emmett."

"How?" Her face was full of worry and guilt.

"Apparently Mike Newton was at Whitlock's tonight. He had quite the story to tell, according to Jasper."

"What an ass. But wait, there's nothing really to tell."

"I know, but Bella doesn't. And she was in no condition to rationalize when I found her. You should have seen that bar. She damn near destroyed it."

"What does she know?" Rosalie asked.

"She knows Emmett loved you in high school and that he never stopped. She knows her marriage is a fallacy."

"She must hate me." Rosalie said, her eyes at the floor.

"Well…" I tried to think of a nice way to put it, but there wasn't one. "Yea---she's pretty pissed."

"Did you tell her I didn't do anything…it wasn't my fault?"

"No…but I will."

"Is that why you two ended up---you know---together? Because she was angry?"

"She was asleep when we got here---passed out. Emmett was in her bed and I couldn't very well leave her there to wake up next to him."

"True---but was sleeping with her such a good idea?"

"I didn't plan to stay in there at all. I intended to take you home and sleep on the couch. But she woke up and started crying…"

"So you slept with her? Edward!" Her eyes were on fire.

"No. You think I…? No. Hell no. I would never take advantage of her like that. I held her. She was crying. I calmed her down. I got her to go back to sleep. I would never…I could never…"

"Thank God. That poor girl has enough to deal with." She said full of concern for her friend.

"Rosalie---you know , this is one big fucking mess"

"I know. And somehow we are both right smack in the middle of it."

"I wish I knew what I'm supposed to do to fix things." I said.

"I know one thing you need to do." Rosalie said as she dropped Bella's keys in my hand. "You need to get me the hell out of here before she wakes up!"

**Please---run--review! Reviewers get to snuggle with Edward!**

**Don't forget to check out The Metamorphosis! ****www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5329447/1/The_Metamorphosis**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you to everyone who is reading---and sticking with this story. There has been an influx of new readers lately---welcome! Be sure to also read Open Door Policy which parallels this story in Bella's POV, along with Knock, Knock Who's There which has outtakes in Emmett's and Jasper's POVs. (I plan for an Alice POV to come!)**

**I am totally unbeta'd---so if you see a big booboo---please message me. Thanks!**

**If you have not yet read Riders on the Storm, my entry in the For the Love of Jasper Contest, you can find it here: ****http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5402210/1/Riders_on_the_Storm**

**You will find all the entries here: ****.net/~fortheloveofjasper**

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**This chapter is dedicated to the fuck-awesome-ladies who keep me giggling over at the GF board. (And the scenery aint too bad, neither!)**

**As always, Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer---I just make her characters do things I'm pretty sure she wouldn't approve of!**

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Rose helped me return Emmett's truck home from Whitlock's, and I made sure she got to her place safely. On the way back from dropping Rose off, I decided to stop at a 24 hour drugstore and pick up some ginger ale, saltines and antacid---just in case Bella might need them. I pulled back up to the house in Bella's car just as the sun was peeking up from behind Forks' tallest trees.

The house was still quiet, and I was pleased considering I'd had absolutely no sleep. I climbed the stairs, my feet heavy from exhaustion, and headed for my room in search of slumber. I hoped Bella had climbed back up onto the bed during the night. I'd hate for her to feel even worse than necessary when she awakened. Plus, I'd be lying if I said I didn't envision myself climbing into my bed with her and drifting to sleep entangled with her body. I dreamt of a few other things we could do, too…inserted between the climbing in and the entangled parts.

My fantasy was brought to an abrupt halt as I simultaneously found my bed to be empty (along with the floor) and heard the wretched sound of abdominal heaving come from the bathroom down the hall.

I ran in to find Bella sitting on the floor. Her body was wrapped around the commode, her cheek resting on the seat. I worked hard to hold back…something; although I wasn't sure if it were a tear or a chuckle. Poor Bella. She didn't even hear my approach; startling as my fingers raked gently through her hair. I carefully pulled her hair back and out of her face before I began massaging her neck. I wasn't exactly sure what I could do to help her, but I was willing to try anything just to make her feel better.

"You okay?" I asked quietly. I was fairly certain her head must be throbbing.

"What do you think?" She asked.

"I think you've probably got one hell of a headache."

She started to laugh but stopped abruptly, bringing her hand up to hold onto her head.

We spent some time rehashing the events from the night before. Much of it was hazy for Bella, and some things were erased from her mind completely. I hated seeing her face once again react to all the terrible truths. I shared everything that Rosalie had told me; every dirty detail. I tried to be as gentle as I could; just wanting to fucking hold her and tell her I would never hurt her like that---that I would spend my life working for her happiness, not against it. But that would have been unfair. Bella had other things on her mind, important things; things involving broken promises made before God. It wasn't the time for me to be thinking of myself.

Bella thanked me repeatedly for being there for her when she needed someone---like I'd be anywhere else. Then, I helped her up off of the bathroom floor, got her some clean clothes from the dryer (since Emmett was asleep in her room) and left her to get cleaned up.

My stomach had been growling up a storm, reminding me that, in the wake of the previous evening's fiasco, we never did have dinner. I darted down the stairs and went straight to the kitchen. I grabbed various items from the fridge and turned to the cabinets to see what I might find there. Deep in the back, behind the canned cranberry sauce leftover from a Thanksgiving past, I spotted some sort of folded fabric. Bella was so neat and organized with her things that my curiosity was piqued. I unfolded the mystery item and discovered it to be the most hideous apron I'd ever seen.

It could only be the handy work of my mother. Esme Cullen was known for giving each member of the family one gag gift every Christmas. The apron I held in my hands, was a good one. It looked to be from the fifties, but it wasn't---an obvious reproduction. It had two large roosters on it. Considering the fact that it was hidden in the cabinet and not long ago thrown out told me that Bella had no idea it had been a joke. She was trying to spare my mother's feelings by keeping it and probably wearing it if she ever came for dinner. _Such a kind heart! _

However, I couldn't resist. That girl needed a good laugh and, frankly, so did I. I giggled to myself as I tied the apron strings around my waist and started cooking breakfast. As the bacon sizzled in the pan, a smile crept across my face when Bella's most recent words replayed in my thoughts.

"_Edward, thank you for being there for me last night. I can't remember everything you did for me, but I know it was a lot. I can't make any promises right now, but when this is all…well, you know. When Emmett and I…"_

She was already thinking of her future, and the possibility of me being in it. I couldn't believe it; Bella considering a future with me. My heart jumped and my pulse raced. I was feeling downright giddy.

I was jolted back to reality by a noise at the door, apprehensive about the confrontation destined to come. But it was Bella I found standing there…snickering…at me.

So pleased to find a smile on her face, I decided to have a little fun with my girl.

I hunched over and squeezed my face up tight. I wasn't exactly sure what I was going for, but it worked. When I waved my finger in her face and said

"Never laugh at cook. You get not-so-special ingredient in food."

Bella laughed out loud and accused me of sounding like Whitlock…of all people!

I kept it up though, anything for her laughter. I threatened to put Tabasco in her eggs, which prompted Bella to wrestle me for the bottle. Her arms were tangled in mine and our faces were so close I could feel her breath on my cheek. Her eyes became soft as their liquid chocolate centers met mine. I felt warmth move into my face as the room got quite quiet and still for a split second. I was debating whether or not it would be appropriate for me to lean in to her lips; stealing a kiss, when Emmett walked in.

Bella and I both froze. I was pretty sure I should have left the room, but I couldn't. I knew my brother's temper and I was pretty sure where the conversation was headed. It was going to get ugly and I was not leaving Bella alone with him. I turned my back and resumed working on breakfast.

Emmett tried to act as if nothing had ever happened; as if Bella was sporting a malicious hangover for no reason. But she did not let him off. Bella called him out on his feelings for Rosalie. I was so fucking proud of her, I couldn't refrain from smiling. Emmett tried to get me to leave, but before I could speak Bella did. That only pissed Emmett off and he tried his typical tactic: bullying. But suddenly Bella and I were a united front and, aside from my brother throwing me out the fucking window, nothing was going to make me leave that kitchen.

My brother tried to manipulate the situation, but Bella stood firm. And, much to my surprise, Emmett caved. He simply folded. I couldn't believe it. He admitted everything: dating Rose in school, making passes at her and continuing to harbor feelings for his old flame. He hid nothing. He even offered to do whatever Bella wanted. It was obvious he knew he'd done wrong and felt like shit about it. Good. He deserved to feel like shit. What was really strange though, was that his concession earned him more of my respect than I ever thought he get in his entire lifetime. I actually saw a spark of humility and honor.

When it was decided that he was to leave their home, it had never dawned on me that I'd be expected to return to my parents' home with him. When Emmett called "C'mon, Edward." My heart dropped. Of course I'd have to go. I couldn't cohabitate with my brother's wife. It was like my life was falling apart, too.

When Bella replied "Edward's not going. He's done nothing wrong. He's staying here." my jaw actually dropped, as did my brother's. I stood like a deer in headlights, unsure of which way to turn and afraid to move. There was no doubt I wanted to be with Bella. I had for as long as I'd known her. But, on the other hand, my brother could be one scary bastard.

It was like I was watching a tennis match; switching back and forth from Emmett's expression to Bella's, trying to gage the mood of the room. Emmett had a look of total defeat; shoulders slack, dark circles under his eyes, furrowed brow. Bella's was a look of defiance and empowerment. Her chin was pointing up slightly and I got the feeling that, at that moment, if Emmett had said the sky was blue Bella would have worked hard to prove him wrong.

I couldn't help but wonder; did Bella really want me around, or was she just knocking Emmett down another peg by keeping me there?

When my brother came down the stairs with his bags, I grabbed two from him and carried them to his truck. He stood with his fists clenched; leaning on his door just looking at me like he had something he needed to say. I braced myself, half expecting to get decked, when Emmett lunged forward, wrapping his thick arm around my neck. He leaned into my ear and whispered "Watch out for her, will ya? She's a good girl."

I stood there stunned and confused, as my brother drove away. When I turned back toward the house, Bella was standing in the door.

My hands in my pockets, looking down at my feet, I journeyed back up the walk to the door. Once Bella's shoes were in my periphery I looked up to find tears flowing freely down her cheeks. I reached for her and she practically leapt into my arms. Bella was a frenzied mess of tears and sniffles and yawns. I carried her into the house and tried to take her up to her bed. When we got to her door she put her hand up on the door frame and shook her head at me. Of course she wouldn't want to go into the room that she shared with her dishonest husband, the smell of him still littering the sheets.

"Where shall I take you?" I asked.

Her eyes looked a bit lost, pleading for something. "Your bed?" she asked.

I did as she asked, setting her down easily on my bed, intending to turn and leave. Before I could move away, Bella's hands clasped my shirt, pulling me on top of her.

Her hands frantically moved through my hair, her body writhing beneath me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me into a kiss. It was deep and passionate; my dick getting harder with every movement of her tongue. God this was what I'd waited so long for. This was the moment I'd only known in my dreams.

I wanted to explore every inch of this woman; to know her intimately. But in my heart, I knew what she was doing. She was using me to forget. But, in doing that, I would always make her remember this day.

Panting heavily, trying to control my own lust and desire, I attempted to rationalize. "Bella, I want this, I do. You are the most amazing creature and fuck I just want to feel you---move with you…. But I'm not sure this is a good idea---today---like this."

Bella tilted her head toward me and I looked into her lust-filled eyes. God she was beautiful like that---even more beautiful than normal. "Edward, I want to be with you. My body has ached for your touch …ever since that very first night."

I cradled her cheek with my fingers and pulled her lips to mine, placing a gentle kiss there. "I want you to remember this as the day you were strong enough to back Emmett down; not the day you lowered yourself to his level."

Her eyes widened and she looked at me with absolute panic. "Oh God. I never even thought…never considered… that maybe…perhaps… you wouldn't want to…"

"Oh Bella, I want to---I've wanted to for as long as I can remember. I don't remember a time I didn't want to---make love---to you."

Her expression was filled with self doubt and fear. I had to do something. I had to fix it.

"Bella, I remember that first night, but I enjoyed the second night even more. We shared something –something so intimate and so sensual. Do you remember?"

She shook her head yes.

"We could do that again---me and you---without technically doing _anything _we not done before_._"

Her brow furrowed and confusion was evident on her face. "But, how am I supposed to…without _him_"

"By touching yourself, Bella." She looked at me with a shock ridden face.

"Sweetie, do you think you can do that?"

"I can try." She smiled nervously.

I stood and slipped off my jeans, only my boxers remaining. I walked to the bedroom door and propped myself against its frame, my gaze never leaving her eyes. I reached down and rubbed my hand across the bulge at the center of my shorts. An involuntary hiss left my lips as my cock began to throb, threatening the integrity of the button that held everything inside the fly.

Bella's eyes were glued on my hand, making me even harder. I watched as her tongue ran across her lips. I smiled my nervous half smile and nodded toward her pants. She slipped her hand inside and a jolt of fucking need and excitement shot through me.

"I want to see you. I need to see you." I said.

Bella pulled her tee shirt over her head, leaving her half nude on my bed. I had to concentrate and regulate my breathing just to keep from cumming inside my boxers.

"You are so beautiful Bella. Your breasts are magnificent. Would you touch one for me?"

Like magic her hand immediately rose and she gently rubbed two fingers across her nipple. I swallowed hard as it pebbled beneath her fingers.

Bella's eyes never once left mine. It was as if the eye contact fueled our fire.

I reached inside my shorts, stroking myself slowly, as to not reach climax too quickly. Bella watched eagerly, her brows rising each time the tip of my cock became visible just above my waistband.

Bella, encouraged by my actions, slid her sweatpants off, leaving her sprawled across my bed in only her panties. They were the same lace panties I'd teased her with earlier, twirling them around on my finger. I so wished I'd had my hands in them now. But it was imperative that everything be right for Bella. We had all the time we needed to move forward. No need to rush.

As Bella's hand disappeared beneath her panties, I groaned and slid my boxers off.

Not to be outdone, Bella raised body just enough and slid her panties down her legs.

I stood in that doorframe, gripping my very hard dick, wondering how much longer I could hold out

"Show me where you like it, Bella. Where does it feel good?"

Bella whimpered as her middle finger burrowed inside her moist center. I knew the moment it traced across her clit. Her eyes rolled back and her hips thrust forward. "Mmmm." came out of her lips, almost a purr.

Bella looked longingly at me, stroking myself for her, and she seemed to have been inspired.

I watched her intently as she rubbed slow circles around her clit, occasionally causing her hips to buck and her knees to tremble.

"C'mon baby. It must feel so good. I'd love to see you cum for me."

Bella moaned at my words and her fingers began to work at a quicker pace.

"You, too." She panted. "I want to see you too."

"Oh, Bella. My dick is so hard right now. Someday it will feel you---it'll be warm inside you. I cannot wait for that day. I will make such beautiful love to you."

She sounded so fucking hot, breathing heavily between quiet moans; her fingers rubbing madly at her hot, wet core causing her own body to writhe and tremble.

Knowing she was close, I tightened my own grip a little to increase the sensation. I rubbed my thumb gently across my sensitive head, spreading the pre-cum to provide a bit of lubrication. I began with a slow rhythm, rocking from base to tip, increasing my pace gradually. When it started really feeling good, I adjusted my angle just a bit and started stroking faster, harder. Just as I saw Bella teetering on the edge of bliss, I began thrusting my hips, working my cock into my palm with force.

Bella's lustful gaze never leaving me, I smiled that same nervous smile and brought myself to ejaculation just as she moaned out in orgasm. God it was fucking beautiful. She was fucking beautiful; lying on my bed, coming down from the ecstasy we'd shared, shimmering with beads of perspiration brought on by our own personal brand of intimacy.

I snuggled in next to her on the bed, placing my head on her chest. She wrapped her fingers into my hair and held me there tightly, as if she were afraid I'd leave.

I whispered "I'm not going anywhere. I'm here as long as you'll let me stay."

She smiled and placed her lips on mine, teasing me with the tip of her tongue. I open my mouth a bit, allowing her in and we shared a most passionate kiss. Then Bella curled into my arms and fell asleep with me, our nude bodies entwined. I knew then, without a shadow of doubt, I'd never ever want to leave.

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**I know it wasn't the "deed" you've been screaming for, but --- "all in due time, my pretties, all in due time!" **

**Reviewers get to kick Emmett in the ass on his way out!!!**

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	9. Chapter 9

**Wow! Thank you HRHLadyEsme for all the kind words you shared in your Lemon-shot on the PPSS. If you're not already following her on Twitter, I highly recommend!! (HRHLadyEsme). **

**Also—thank you AnnettesKitty for agreeing to beta this for me at the last minute. If you haven't checked out her Daniel Gale blog---DO IT!**

**I have had a really rough couple weeks---the kinda shit we're not allowed to write about in fics for most contests if ya get my drift. Thank you, thank you to my twitter peeps and to the girls in the cave on the GR board for all your support!!**

**As always—Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer. I just enjoy making her characters do bad things. ;o)**

Lying next to Bella and listening to the rhythm of her breathing made my heart dance. Her face held a look of peace; the likes of which I'd not read on her expression since I'd arrived in Forks. Her russet locks cascaded across her pillow in an abstract pattern and I couldn't resist brushing a few stray strands from her cheek. Very carefully, gently, I pressed my lips to her forehead.

She was absolute perfection and beauty; every bit as beautiful as, if not more than, the first time I'd set eyes on her.

_It was sophomore year. I had been placed in a weightlifting class as an error on the part of the guidance office. Two weeks into the first semester, after enduring all I could and upon the recommendation of Coach James, I was placed into a Ceramics class being taught by Mrs. Stanley. I had taken several drawing classes and a painting class with her, and she was really nice to me. So, even though ceramics was not my preferred art medium, I was relieved to be out of weightlifting. _

_I was switched in the middle of the class period. As I walked in, Mrs. Stanley was going over the techniques of bonding two separate pieces of clay together in a way to withstand the kiln process. Already knowing me as a capable art student, she just plunked a block of clay in my hand and directed me to find a seat. I wandered the room aimlessly in search of an empty chair; avoiding a table full of cheerleaders and circling widely around my brother's jock friends. I walked immediately to the table where Eric Yorkie and Angela Weber were smiling in my direction. I knew Eric from years of Math competitions and Angela had been in my AP English class the year before. Always the serious student, I quickly got busy working my brand new clay, listening closely to Mrs. Stanley in hopes that I could make a gift for my mother for Christmas. As the art teacher moved toward the back of the room, that's when I noticed her, an angel. The loveliest mocha eyes, deep set and inquisitive, caught my glance. Her fair complexion offset by her long silky brunette strands. A few random freckles scattered her nose as she chewed on the bottom of her rose petal lips. The first girl I had ever truly **seen** was sitting alone in my art class. Bella Swan. _

_I loved watching her hands work the clay; the way her light pink nails would peek through. The potter's wheel was her particular forte, and my secret sinful pleasure. Gently and carefully, with skilled and patient hands, she would stroke and caress until the lump she started with inevitably became a beautiful work of art. It was absolutely sensual the way she handled the clay. She truly had a gift. And that gift brought me extreme pleasure. I imagined how those hands might feel on my skin…and I longed for her touch. Many a morning I had to be the last to leave ceramics, waiting out the affects of watching Bella on the wheel. _

_Ceramics quickly became my favorite subject. Although I never quite got the nerve to actually sit with her, I made up little scenarios in my mind of how it might play out between us if I had arrived early for class and sat at her table. Even though each scenario was made up of wonderful conversations and laughter, deep down I was certain I'd make a fool of myself. On the last day of the semester, I walked directly to my seat with Eric and Angela, even though I had made a silent promise that- by the end of the class-I'd speak to her. Disappointed in myself, I quickly signed up for Ceramics II. _

_But, Bella was not in that class. It was the longest semester of my academic career._

A sudden knock at the door brought me back to the present. I hustled down the stairs, not wanting the noise to wake Bella. I opened the door to find Whitlock and Bella's cousin, Alice, standing on the front stoop. I immediately noticed their hands clasped together…fingers-entwined. They seemed so natural and comfortable that way, as if it'd always been. I tried to fight back a smile, with only half success.

"Come in." I said, closing the door behind them.

"Damn! Bella was right. You do look different." Alice's eyes were wide as she was very obviously looking me over.

"Umm, thanks?" I replied, nervously.

"So sorry to barge in, London. I tried to express earlier that perhaps the larger Cullen might not welcome our unannounced visit, but this beautiful pixie insisted." Jasper explained.

"I'm not afraid of that big bag of wind. In fact, I can't wait to get my hands on him! Where is he, anyway?" Alice, quick as a flash, was starting up the stairs before I could stop her.

"Shhhh, Alice. He's not here. Bella's upstairs sleeping and, consider all she's been through, she really needs some rest. I promise we're the only ones in the house."

The tiny dynamo stopped in her tracks. "Seriously? How'd you manage that?" She arched her brow.

"Emmett was in no position to argue?" I shrugged.

Alice laughed. "But I figured you and your brother would have been a package deal…unpacking your bags to share a room at Mommy and Daddy C's by now." Alice smiled at me like she already knew the answer.

I was rather surprised my mom had not even called yet.

Taking the stairs two at a time, Alice surprised me by wrapping her arms around my neck.

"Good for Bella! I'm surprised she had the nerve, but it's about time she actually admitted to herself what she really wanted…and went for it."

I wasn't sure which surprised me more, Alice's words or her gesture. Stepping back, I studied Alice's face. She really meant it. I was what Bella _really_ wanted.

"And you're okay with this?" I asked curiously.

Both eyebrows up this time, she said "Edward Cullen, my opinion should mean nothing to you and Bella. But since you asked and you seem to need some sort of approval…you definitely have mine! No offense, but I have never been able to stand that big oaf of a brother of yours!"

"No offense taken, believe me!" I laughed. I really did seem to need some sort of approval. I had no idea how my parents were going to react and I was very surprised we'd not even heard from my mother yet.

I looked at Jasper standing quietly beside Alice now. It had been the longest I'd ever been around him without hearing his voice. Turning to Jasper, I asked "How is it that the two of you happened upon Bella's house at precisely the same moment? I smirked as he got a bewildered "deer in the headlights" look about him.

Alice jumped right in. "Well, Jasper here had Bella's purse that she must have left behind on her way out of his bar last night. Jasper was clever enough to check inside for her cell phone. And my number happened to be the first one that came up on her contacts list--you know---A for Alice. So he called in hopes of getting Bella's bag back to her. Wasn't that thoughtful?"

I raised my brow at my normally fast-talking, yet suddenly silent friend. "I guess I'm just a lucky guy?" he said shrugging his shoulders and looking terribly sheepish. For a fast talker, he was a terrible liar.

I'd have bet good money he'd have been spewing stories of karma…and the moon and sun and planets all being perfectly aligned. But no story came.

Maybe Jasper couldn't squeeze a word in or perhaps he didn't need to talk fast for Alice. Maybe he could just be himself…whoever that was. I hoped so…for my friend's sake. He had been my perfect confidant and sounding board; having played such a pivotal role in my getting closer to Bella. He too deserved a little long-awaited happiness.

Before long, Bella woke up and came downstairs. As she and Alice caught up on everything that had happened, Jasper and I stepped outside. That's when the old Whitlost showed up again.

"So, my smooth operating friend, how exactly did you get Papa Bear out, leaving Mama Bear behind to play house with you?" he asked with a wink.

"Just as I said, it was all Bella's doing. And for the record, we're not playing house. Not yet." I explained.

Jasper sat down on a wooden bench and sucked his breath in through his teeth. "And why do you suppose old Attila the Hub didn't fight to maintain possession of what was rightfully his?"

That had been puzzling me, too. I didn't understand why Emmett had left so easily. It wasn't my big brother's normal style. Emmett did not lose…ever! There was only one reason I could possibly think of, and Jasper and I voiced it at the same time. "Rosalie?!"

Later that evening, upon Bella's insistence and against my better judgment, we took a ride over to Rosalie Hale's apartment. Bella was adamant about thanking her for the friendship and respect she shown.

The entire ride across town, I had a bad feeling about going there. I convinced myself that it was probably nothing and that, in light of everything that had happened since my return to Forks, I needed to start trying to see the glass as half full. We parked on the street and walked to the large double doors at the entrance to Rosalie's building. I held the door for Bella, never even noticing the familiar SUV parked discreetly on the side of the building. We rode the elevator all the way up to the 10th floor. Staring at the brown wooden door to Rosalie's apartment for what felt like forever, Bella finally knocked. I could hear the lock turn just before Rosalie's face appeared in the cracked door. I couldn't help but notice the look of surprise on her face as she looked from Bella to me and back.

"Bella? Um…hi. Wow. You two…I figured you'd be…umm…why are you here?"

Bella replied "Rose, I'm sorry for coming unannounced, but I just really needed to thank you in person for…"

From somewhere further inside the apartment we heard a recognizable voice shout "Who is it, Babe? Aw hell, who cares? Just get rid of 'em." As the words stopped, it was Emmett's towel-clad form that appeared from behind Rosalie in the doorway.

Before I could even think or react or speak, Bella's arms wrapped around my neck and pulled me to her. She met my mouth with eager lips, her tongue quickly finding mine. I loved the feel of her, the taste of her. She raked her fingers through my hair and I indulged in her softness, running my hand down her side, hesitating as my thumb outlined the fullness of her breast. Her actions were desperate and hungered and, although I was well aware of exactly what provoked them, I was helpless to do anything but return her passion. Random thoughts ran through my mind simultaneously. _Eat your fucking heart out, big brother--- you insensitive ass. God, I love this girl. And, damn, she's kissing me right in front of Emmett. Who's got the girl now, asshole! Fuck, she's kissing me __**right in front of Emmett**__? I am such a dead man! Oh, but GOD she tastes so damn good. At least I'll die with a smile..._

Lost in my own realm of deliria, I was forced back to reality by the sound of wood cracking beneath Emmett's fist as it struck the door.

**If you have not yet read the outtakes for these stories, see "Knock, Knock, Who's There?" on my author's page. You'll find outtakes in Emmett's, Jaspers and Rose's POVs.**

**Reviewers get to work a potter's wheel with Edward--- **_**Ghost**_** style!!!! Run---review---he's waiting!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you to those who review. Whether you review me---or someone else---remember it is SO important for a writer to get feedback.**

**There will be one more chapter each for ODP and OSotD. Then I will post an epilogue under Open Door Policy…since it has more alerts. Thanks so much for sticking with this story. I heart you all!**

**Everything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer. I just borrow her characters.**

"Bam!" was all I heard, triggering me to pull away from Bella's lips. My eyes were squeezed tightly and my body was stiff, bracing myself for the next blow...which I was fairly certain would strike my face. Surprisingly, nothing came. Slowly I opened each eye to find my brother stepping from foot to foot, clenching and unclenching his fists. He appeared to be in the midst of some sort of internal struggle. He was visibly agitated... he was looking at me...and I was pretty sure I knew what he was agitated about . Again, I was amazed not to be wearing his knuckle prints on my face.

"What the fuck?!" he boomed. His eyes glared form me to Bella and back to me. I continued to brace myself for his next blow.

We stood there, the four of us, in a kind of silence that could only precede a storm; the rhythm of our breathing was the only sound.

Rosalie ended the silence. "Emmett Cullen, if you so much as raise your voice again...let alone your fist, you can leave my home and never ever return."

You should've seen my brother's face as he froze in response to her words.

"I am serious!" she added.

I couldn't believe how his entire persona seemed to change right before our eyes. My eyes darted to Bella who appeared equally as stunned I felt. Seeing her standing there, her mouth slightly agape… her brow sadly furrowed, filled me with a need to beat the hell out of my brother for ever having made her feel that way. Nobody that I knew of had ever had that sort of control over Emmett, other than maybe our mom. So, this was an Emmett very foreign to me.

Reminiscent of a small child, Emmett whined to Rose. "She didn't have to flaunt kissing him in my face. Does she think I've been blind?"

His words hit me like a thunderbolt. Fuck! Emmett knew…or suspected…something. I couldn't believe that my brother assumed there were feelings between me and his wife...yet he left me at the house with her. I was shocked he hadn't tried to kick my ass right there in the street after I'd loaded his car for him. That would have been just Emmett's style.

Unsure how long I'd been lost in thought, I was brought back to reality when Rosalie mentioned my name. I immediately turned to Bella who was watching me intently. "You okay?" I asked. She nodded. Rose grasped my arm and announced that we were going to Starbucks.

_What the hell? I didn't want fucking coffee. I needed to stay and protect Bella!_

The thought made my heart jump for a number of reasons. I wasn't worried that my brother might hurt her physically. Emmett would never strike a woman. My father had instilled in us a strict code of conduct regarding women from the time we were young boys. But to abuse her verbally or emotionally was another story.

I watched Bella's face for a clue to what she was thinking. I didn't know if it was my place to jump in with my opinion. This really was her situation to deal with. And I still wasn't completely sure what my role might be in her future...or if I'd have one at all. I hoped that the passion I felt in her kiss was really for me and not just about making Emmett jealous.

I looked into Bella's eyes and she squeezed my hand. I wanted to hug her, to tell her I'd be waiting for her when she was done and that everything would be okay. More than anything, I wanted to kiss away the wrinkle from her forehead, nibble away the frown from her lips. But I didn't. I just glared at Emmett. If she came back to me anything less than perfect, he was going to pay.

I glanced back at them repeatedly as Rosalie led me to the elevator. I could not keep my eyes from darting back to Bella…her face… her posture. Her sadness consumed me. Our entire journey down the block, I fought the need to run back…grab her hand and drag her away from him.

I sat in the corner booth at Starbucks wondering what the hell I was doing there. I wasn't exactly in the mood for coffee. I'd gone against every instinct I'd had to stay with Bella. Long ago, I had followed someone else's advice and it allowed _him _the opportunity to marry the girl I loved.

Digging my fingernails into the fleshy parts of my hands, I second guessed my leaving. I was dying to know what was happening in Rosalie's building.

"Here ya go" Rosalie handed me a tall cup of black coffee and sat on the other side of the booth. She smiled faintly as she sipped something that looked more like a milkshake than a cup of coffee.

"How can you just sit there, so calmly?" I asked.

"I didn't realize I was." She said. "No point in becoming a neurotic mess. What will be, will be."

"What do _you_ think…will be?"

"I really don't know. I do know that if I were in Bella's shoes, I'd never trust my husband again. Anytime he ever left the house, I'd have to wonder where he was going."

I exhaled slowly in an attempt to relax. "You're probably right."

"But that doesn't mean I'd easily give upon the vows I made before God, either."

My fingers dug deeper into my flesh. "That, I didn't need to hear."

"Edward, you and I have waited a long time to be with the people we love. Being patient a little longer is not going to kill either of us."

I watched Rosalie Hale, in her little pink sweater and pearls, sipping her fluffy coffee. She wore a look of serenity I would never understand.

"And what about you? Will you ever trust Emmett?"

She smiled wryly and her eyes wandered the room as she spoke, thinking back. "I've always trusted Emmett. I can't explain it, but I have. I don't understand why he left me for Bella. And I was hurt and angry when it happened. There was even a time that I hated him for the choices he'd made. But I grew to realize it had to be more than what I saw. Emmett's eyes when he looked at me told me that. He always wore a look of longing and sadness that I couldn't understand." She patted the top of my hand on the table. "But I've always believed that this was somehow God's plan for me and someday it'd all make sense. And I can't help but feel that I'm closer to that point now than I've ever been."

I knew exactly what Rosalie was referring to. I'd overheard the story when Emmett had shared the details with Bella. I could have told her, I could have shed light on the whole ugly mess. But it involved her mother, which wouldn't make it easy for her to hear. Plus it wasn't my place or my story to tell. I did feel bad keeping it from her, especially after she'd been so open and honest with me.

Seconds turned to minutes, minutes became hours. I'd long finished my coffee and had been checking my watch every five minutes for the past three hours. I, once again, adjusted the volume on my cell phone and checked my missed calls. I was pacing; my legs numb from sitting so long.

Rosalie was smiling, checking her lipstick in her compact. She'd already balanced her checkbook, filed her nails and read a magazine and had moved on to cleaning out her purse.

I wished I'd had her patience and her optimism. But, I didn't. Not where Bella was concerned, anyway. Not today. I knew I had no right to be impatient or to have any expectations at all, but I'd hit the point where I was beyond reason.

I began picking up the items from Rosalie's purse that were now spread all over the table and tossed them back into her bag.

"Hey, I wasn't done reorganizing." She snapped.

"This is ridiculous! We're going back to your place, and we're going now!"

I grabbed Rose's arm and led her out the door and down the block. She muttered words of objection behind me, but I ignored them. I HAD to know what was happening.

As we approached the building, I noticed Emmett's truck was gone. My heart sank and I became even more concerned for Bella. Perhaps I'd underestimated my brother. Perhaps I didn't know what he was capable of. Perhaps he'd done something to hurt her.

Rosalie was humming as she pressed the button for the elevator. Too impatient to wait, I headed for the stairs. Taking them two at a time I arrived at Rose's floor several moments before she stepped out of the elevator doors.

I was pounding on her door, shouting Bella's name. No answer.

Fumbling in her purse for her keys, Rosalie stepped quickly to open the door. I wasn't sure if Rose was just responding to my desperation, or if she had grown concerned herself. Once inside, we each hurried to different rooms in the house. There was no sign of anyone. Thankfully, there was also no sign of any sort of struggle.

Rosalie took to the phone, making calls and asking for Emmett.

I left her there, angry that I'd ever followed her from that building. Digging the keys from my pocket, I made a dash for Bella's car. I retraced our route from earlier, heading toward her house. There was no sign of Bella or Emmett. Everything was just as we'd left it.

I called Alice but she'd not heard from Bella either. She was meeting Whitlock at the bar for the night and promised to call if Bella made an appearance there. In return, I vowed to let her know as soon as I found her cousin.

I was speeding as I drove the 6 blocks to my parent's house. I figured it was a long shot, but _what the hell. _I turned onto the street and I spied Emmett's truck in front of the house. _'Bella had better be with him' _, I thought as I sprinted up the walk and threw open the front door to the living room. Nobody. _Shit!_

Slowly, I moved to the dining room. I could hear low, muffled sounds coming from inside. My hand trembled as I pushed open the door. I found my father sitting in his chair at the head of the table, visibly distressed. One hand was palm down, flat on the table. The other had a death grip on the bridge of his nose. His eyes may have been closed, I couldn't tell. Carlisle Cullen was usually a man not easily shaken. Seeing him sitting there like that caused bile to rise up and burn in my throat.

Next to him at the table was Emmett. My brother was straddling the back of the dining room chair, facing away from my father. His head was in his hands, and his whole body was jerking and shaking emphatically. Every now and then he emitted a low, guttural moan.

"Where is she?!" I shouted.

Neither man said a word. My father looked at Emmett.

I stiffened, fear making my body cold, and I started for my brother.

"Tell me where the fuck she is, Emmett!" I demanded.

I heard my mother's voice come from the kitchen. "Edward?"

_Oh, please. Please!_

I ran past my father, his eyes darting up to meet mine as I passed. But my eyes were focused on the door to the kitchen and what I prayed I'd find there.

My mother stood at the far end of the room with her back to me, staring out the wall of windows that overlooked the backyard. And next to her, an absolute vision, was Bella.

_Thank God! _

Her hair fell neatly to her shoulders. Her clothes were not so much as rumpled. She looked completely unscathed and…absolutely perfect. I became choked up at the sight of her.

She was standing closely behind my mom, her cheek resting on my mother's back. Bella's arms cradled her shoulders, as my mother reached up to place a hand atop of Bella's. They appeared calm, serene. I'd already made it to the middle of the room by the time they each turned toward me. That's when I discovered my mother's face was red and swollen. She had been crying!

**I know this chapter didn't exactly get you where you want to be. (You h00rs just want that illicit LEMON! LOL) Have patience, it's cumming! **

**Reviewers get to kick the chair right out from under Emmett!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks to ****emilydmamaof3**** for beta-ing this for me at the last minute. For the record...she did try to talk me out of ending this chapter where I did. LOL  
**

**Everything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

It was hard to believe that two whole months had passed since the blow out at my parents' house. I was so fucking desperate and scared when I walked in there. Considering my brother had always been basically a stranger to me, I had no idea what he was capable of once backed into a corner. I was unsure if he'd hurt her, uncertain of where he may have taken her. I just needed to know that Bella was safe and okay. Of one thing I became absolutely positive the moment I saw her beautiful face in my parent's kitchen; I would never let anyone or anything stand between Bella and I ever again. Only if, of course, she wished to have me.

My mom took it much better than I thought, Bella and I ...being...whatever it was that we were to one another. She was visibly upset, I could see it. Feeling as if she'd had a hand in the entire fiasco from the start and learning that it was me who had been in love with Bella for so long. I even noticed the semblance of a smile on her lips as I embraced the woman of my dreams right there in her kitchen. Normally, I'd never have done something so bold, so "in your face", but I was just fucking relieved to have found her. On the way out of the house, my mother squeezed me tightly and kissed my forehead. That must be when she stuck something in the pocket of my jacket. I found it when I had reached for Bella's keys; a note written in red marker on a post-it note. It said "I'm sorry. We'll talk."

My father, on the other hand, had no idea how to react. It was obvious. He was furious with Emmett, but said very little to me. He had that disappointed look about him, the one I'd learned to try and avoid as a child. But I wasn't sure if it was inspired by Emmett's behavior...or mine. I'm sure it would have been easier for all of them if Emmett and Bella were just splitting up, clean and easy. But with me involved, it made things messy, uncomfortable. I'm sure my father was devastated by the realization that his boys would now never have a close relationship like he and my Uncle James had. Over time, he and my mother had grown to feel like parents to Bella. And, as much as I'm sure it pleased my mother to keep Bella in her life, I was sure a future filled with uncomfortable family holidays had more than crossed her mind.

I still hadn't talked to my mom in response to her note. I just needed some time and distance between the craziness of it all. Maybe I was punishing her a little, in my own way, for meddling all those years ago. But I also wanted to be there for Bella...completely. She was the one experiencing loss. I couldn't imagine what she must have been feeling. Having never been close to her own family, she had adopted mine and they loved her back ten-fold. I couldn't know what it was like to lose something I never felt I'd had and my family and I had always been somewhat strangers. Besides, Bella was all I'd ever really wanted for as far back as I could remember and I planned to cherish each moment we had for however long it may be.

When I woke that morning, Bella was already up and out of the house. She left me a note that she had met Alice for coffee. She'd been spending more time with her cousin since the break-up, and I found myself hanging out with Whitlost more than I normally may have. Not that I minded. That guy, for all the nonsense he spoke, seemed to have a keen eye for the answers to all of life's problems. He was a wiser and deeper human being than you might suspect at first glance.

I took my time getting out of bed. Bella and I were still sharing the double bed in the guest room. She seemed in no hurry to return to the room she had shared with Emmett, although she had insisted we go out and buy a new mattress set for it. I went with her, store to store, holding her hand as she'd press her palms on each mattress and tried out a few. The ones she really liked, she'd insisted I try them out, too. Perhaps that was a good sign of many nights together to come, I'd hoped. Although we were sharing a bed already, it was completely platonic other than her head on my shoulder as I held her while she fell asleep. A few times she would wake up crying after a nightmare and I'd soothe her, rubbing her back and shoulders until she drifted back off again. But that's as far as things went. The mattress had been delivered a week ago and we were still residing in the guest room. A sign to me that she was not yet ready to move on; not mentally ready to jump into another relationship. It was too soon. And I actually appreciated the fact that she wanted me around even though it wasn't physically romantic yet. Maybe that meant I was more than just her rebound guy. Other than mattress shopping, Emmett's name had not come up since we left him at my parent's house. It was like she was trying to block it all out. Except for the large yellow envelope on the kitchen counter. From my father's attorney. It had remained unopened and untouched since the day I brought it in from the box several weeks ago. I secretly had hoped she'd have ripped it open, signing it immediately, happy to be rid of my asshole brother. But, apparently, there was more to it than that. I wasn't surprised. I was certain Bella would never have entered a marriage with my brother had she not loved him and planned to fulfill that oath she'd made before God. And, of course, she would be feeling loss, failure. It was only natural. At least, that's what I told myself.

I moved from the bed to the shower, washing away the empty feeling I felt when that was how I found Bella's side of the bed. The note on her pillow was short, but thoughtful.

"Edward,

Meeting Alice for coffee. Call me if you'd like me to bring you back anything. I won't be too long.

Kisses,

Bella"

Kisses. From Bella. How I longed for those. Her soft lips. Warm against mine. My fingers wrapped in her hair. The hot slickness of her tongue caressing mine.

Dammit my hard-on. I swore if I didn't get release soon the damn thing would fall off...or leave me in revolt...just pack a bag and head out.

I leaned my head against the cool tiles, my soapy fingers slowly descending until they landed where I needed touch most. My mind raced with thoughts of her. The sounds she made as she slept. How my name sounded leaving her lips. The dip of her lower back. The soft curve of her hip. The puckering of her breast pressing through the thin fabric of her nightclothes on a cool evening. The memory of her face, her eyes, her sounds as she led herself to climax ...enticing my own personal pleasure.

For the first time in two months, I let everything go. I stopped trying to make my every move the right one. I stopped ....fucking ...thinking. I only felt...felt the pleasure of her touch mirrored through my own. Felt my satisfaction come to a head...felt the ecstasy that came with freeing the long overdue built up tension I'd been harboring as I brought myself to blissful release right there...alone...standing... my head against the wall... in the shower.

What should have left me feeling sated and contented and relaxed...only proved to make me feel even more lonely ...disappointed ...and even a bit pathetic.

I wrapped a white towel from the bathroom rack around my hips, water droplets still clinging to my shoulders. Dropping down to sit at the edge of the bed, my elbows on my knees, I raked my fingers through my wet hair. I felt as though a turning point was due. Maybe Bella was waiting for me to initiate furthering our intimacy. I wasn't thinking sex, although that would be...well...unbelievable. I just needed to get an idea of what we were now...now that we'd sort of relaxed into a comfortable routine that somewhat resembled...roommates.

Looking up from my lap, I saw the phone on the bedside stand. That's when I realized there was something I had been avoiding. I reached for the handset and dialed my childhood number. Mom answered on the second ring.

"Edward! I was just thinking of you. I'm so glad you've called." she said.

"I'm sorry it's taken so long."

"Don't apologize to me, Edward...please. I completely understand why you may not want to talk to me."

"It's not that, Mom. It could never be that. I just didn't know what to say."

"Then, don't. Let me...please. I am SO very sorry for...for everything. "

"Mom..." I tried to interrupt.

"Edward, let me finish. I should never have over-looked you back then. Thinking back now, I should have known right away that it was you who was responsible for such selfless, romantic signs of affection. You had always been my thoughtful boy...even as a young child. You may not remember, but you once invited me to the basement for a date. You had set up a dusty old card table and chairs, covering it with my good lace table cloth." My mother laughed before finishing. "Dixie cups held lemonade that made my cheeks pucker and paper plates held tiny peanut butter and jelly sandwiches you'd prepared on saltines. You had even gathered a bundle of cherry blossoms from the back yard and put them in an old mayonnaise jar in the center of the table. Do you remember that?"

I didn't. But I said I did.

"Then, when you had gotten older, you withdrew and became so quiet. You even came to dinner with your headphones on...music blaring. I thought you were blocking us out; pushing us away. I thought I didn't know you anymore. But I should have realized you were probably insecure and confused about growing up. I should have tried talking to you, helped you transition more easily into adulthood...or encouraged your father to speak to you. But instead, I thought if I gave you space it would all work itself out. Turns out, you hadn't changed at all; still sensitive and reserved. It was only my perception of you that had changed. You were the same person. you'd always been...even if you preferred to stay in your room and didn't speak up. I should have known that."

I didn't know what to say. The line remained quiet for awhile. Then, my mother said "You love her, don't you?"

"Yes." I didn't even have to think about the answer.

"She's a good girl, like a daughter to me. I want to see her happy...she deserves a good life. Be patient with her Edward, she's going through an ordeal."

"Does that mean you're okay with...me...and...Bel...?"

"Edward Cullen! I will certainly not be the one to stand between the two of you again! If you two are in love and are meant to be together, then it doesn't really matter what anyone thinks, does it?"

"No." I said softly. "It doesn't"

"But, in case you need it...for whatever reason, I want the very best for both of you, together or apart."

"Thanks, Mom.

My head still damp, I threw on a pair of jeans and jogged downstairs to the kitchen. I grabbed the orange juice from the fridge and reached into the cabinet above the counter for a glass. Staring at me from the center of the counter, obviously removed from the spot it had kept for over a month, sat the large yellow envelope addressed to Mrs. Isabella Swan Cullen. I stared at it, wondering for what reason it had been moved, and noticed it sat less than flat on the counter. Lifting the corner, I saw it had been opened, a thick fold of papers sticking out a bit from inside.

I stood, juice in one hand...glass in the other ...staring at the envelope. I wondered if that was what had prompted Bella to leave...to seek the comfort of her cousin. I imagined her staring wide-eyed at my brother's demands, tears stinging her eyes. What would he ask for? The house? The large screen television? Their bed? Their savings? He deserved nothing, although I was sure Bella wouldn't want anything that served as a reminder of her pain.

I wanted so much to know what was in that envelope. To read the documents put together by one of the finest attorneys in Washington; one Emmett could never afford on his own. One my father had on retainer. It angered me a bit that my father must have supported Emmett.

I traced the corner of the envelope with my finger, as if by touch I could somehow know what was inside. I wouldn't look inside. I couldn't. It was none of my business unless Bella wanted me to know.

I heard Bella's key turn in the front door and hurried to the table, away from the envelope, to pour my juice.

I listened as she dropped her bag on the table by the door and turned the deadbolt; a habit I'd noticed she'd picked up since Emmett had left. I wondered if she didn't feel as safe with just me or if she was locking it for privacy form someone who might just barge in. I heard her footsteps coming closer and I sat at the table to drink my juice.

"Hi." She said, smiling and handing me a large Starbucks cup. "We were out of coffee. I figured you might need this."

"Thanks." I stood to receive the cup and pressed a kiss to her temple. "Sleep well?" I asked. I knew she hadn't. I had felt her tossing and turning all night.

"No, actually. I didn't. But I'm hoping I will tonight for the first time in a while." She smiled, big and beautiful. It had been too long since I'd seen that smile.

"That's fantastic. I'm curious though. What has brought on this new outlook?"

I guess I just needed to put things into perspective."

"Alice help with that?" I asked. Her cousin had a way of saying exactly what needed to be said without pulling any punches or softening any blows.

"A little. She called this morning and convinced me that I needed to stop prolonging my own agony. Then she insisted we meet for coffee to celebrate."

"Celebrate?" I asked.

She nodded toward the yellow envelope on the counter. The one that, before today, had remained unopened. She was smiling, big and beautiful. It had been so long since I'd seen her smile like that. My heart raced.

"Did you look?" she asked, eyebrows raised.

"No." I said defensively. I'd wanted to SO fucking bad. But I didn't.

She traced her fingers along my shoulders as she walked around my chair to retrieve the envelope. I hardened instantly at her touch. I don't think she'd meant it seductively, just a need for the physical contact.

She handed it to me and smiled a big toothy grin, like she'd just won the lottery or gotten a promotion or something.

I pulled out the thick fold of paperwork and began reading at the beginning. Bella stood before me fidgeting, rocking from foot to foot. I looked at her from above the paperwork and raised my eyebrows in question.

"Are you going to read the whole thing?" she asked.

"Do you not want me to read it?"

"No. I mean, I don't care. But look at the last page...the bottom of the last page." Her fingers dug at the stack of papers in my hand until I was looking at her signature at the bottom of the last page.

She'd signed them.

She'd signed them!

I looked into her eyes sparkling with pride. "I faxed them over this morning."

And then, my stomach sank.

"Bella, did you have anyone look these papers over before you signed them?"

"I didn't have to."

"Bella. My father's attorney is the best. You need to be sure that things are done fairly." Fair being Emmett's ass on a stick!

"Oh, things were not done fairly at all, but if it's what Emmett wants..."

"What?!"

Bella giggled, her joy overflowing. "Edward, he left me everything. All contents of the house, everything. All he asked for was enough of our savings to set him up in an apartment. He's not fighting me. He's walking away."

That's when a flash if guilt hit me. My father was always a fair man, and I was sure he had indeed influenced Emmett decisions.

Bella threw her arms around my neck and I pulled her to me. I wasn't sure what all of this meant to her...to us, until I felt Bella drag her fingertips lazily along my neck and shoulders. I looked into her eyes, only to find them looking back at me as she leaned d toward me. Our lips met and I actually got fucking butterflies in my stomach. _God! I'd waited so long for this!_

We stood there in the kitchen, just kissing for a really long time. I pulled back to look at Bella, her lips beautifully red and swollen and she smiled. Not big and toothy like before. She smiled seductively, taking her bottom lip between her teeth, making me want to do really naughty things to her.

"Umm, Bella, if you keep standing there like that..."

She reached for my hand and led me out of the kitchen to the stairs.

I wrinkled my forehead at her, not wanting to get my hopes up too much. She smirked again, her eyes darting to the tops of the stairs.

"Are you sure?" I asked

She answered me by pulling her blouse over her head without even unbuttoning it. _Oh my God!_

"Bella, just because you signed the papers, doesn't mean..."

One flick of her wrist and her bra had dropped to the stairs. _Christ! _

"Not that I'm against this or anything..."

She stepped out of her jeans, pulling me further up the stairs in nothing but a thong, leaving them there in a pile. _Sweet Mother!_

I didn't say another word. I just followed. at that moment, I'd have followed her fucking anywhere...off a bridge...into a volcano.

But instead she led me to the master bedroom...to the new bed we'd picked out together. She climbed onto the mattress and met me on her knees, her arms wrapped around my middle, her lips on my chest.

I expected to wake up at any moment, hard and frustrated.

But I didn't.

It was really fucking happening,.

I placed my fingers under her chin, raising her lips toward mine. I kissed her hard, years worth of passion all balled up in that one kiss. I kissed her like a man freed from a prison he thought he'd been sentenced to for life. I kissed her like a man in desperate need of this woman. I kissed her...like a fool in love.

And she kissed me back, full of passion and longing and...maybe love, too.

Her hands moved to my waist and the layers of clothing I had there. I watched as she fiddled with the button, eased down my zipper, lowered my jeans, my shorts. My breaths grew rapid, anxious...awaiting her touch. Her soft gentle fingers caressed my shaft from tip to base. A noise from somewhere deep inside escaped my lips, something between a moan and a gasp. She looked up at me, her eyes filled with passion and need. I leaned into her neck, kissing and nibbling and panting; her touch bringing me far more pleasure than I could have ever imagined. Slowly, I allowed my fingers to trail down her shoulder to her breast. I rubbed her taut nipples with my palm, completely appreciating their arousal. I dipped my head to allow my tongue to toy with one of her tender peaks as my hand continued to slowly forge a trail south. My thumb outlined her navel, caressed her hip before seeking out the soft curls I knew to be awaiting my touch below. I fingered circles through them before drifting my thumb lower, feeling her breath on my shoulder as she gasped in response to my touch. Her arousal was evident as I easily slid my thumb around her clit before slowly gliding it across her center. Her hips jerked on impulse and I found myself leaning into her, guiding her backward onto the bed.

I gazed at the beauty before me, the girl of my dreams, her hair spiraled out on the crisp new spread. Smiling at me. Wanting me.

I would love this girl forever and forever.

And I would begin by making love to her on this day...thoroughly.

**I know---throw rocks...tomatoes. I deserve it! I'm such a dirty cock blocker!! But I wanted to share some of Edwards happiness and triumph, yet leave the heart of the lemon to Bella. I figured What he was feeling from EPOV was not nearly as important as learning HOW he felt from BPOV. So, I am leaving you something to look forward to...the last regular chapter of Open Door Policy is up next. It will be followed by the Epilogue. I haven't decided which POV to do it in yet---perhaps both. Anyone have a problem with an Epi from each??**

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